Working in an IT department in Financial Institution: 1. Hey guys look at Tania’s photo on her batch:Isn’t it a slut photo? 2. I bet you like to tie up guys 3. You better come and work in my office , it’s warmer here 4. Last Friday my boss “accidentally” hit my knee with his own cause I contradicted his argument And for the fact that I do not flirt with men and that I am assertive , I got a reputation of being cold and difficult to work with…
This is not my story, but rather a friend’s. My friend witnessed a fight between two boys at our high school, and alerted a teacher. The teacher told the office and the next day my friend was summoned to the assistant principal’s office. The first words out of his mouth when she entered the room were none other but the famous, “So, sweetie.. I heard yesterday you witnessed some boys being boys.” My friend was furious but felt too intimidated by his power and her lackthereof (she is a freshman girl in a big high school). She politely explained the situation, but no action was taken against these boys even though she had provided their names, the location where this happened, and basically as much information as she could. The worst part is that girls have gotten in trouble with this same assistant principal for their skirts being too short, but actual violence is brushed off as a matter of gender.
Night out in soho for my friends 30th. Its great. Been dancing in my heels. Get tired and call it a night. Walking along oxford street. Walking slowly due to heels (also in black tights, thick coat and a hat). Guy comes up to me. I think he’s asking for directions. He’s got a foreign accent so can’t really understand. He repeats the word disco. I say no i dont know any discos. He then goes on seemingly ask if I’m a regular. I say no i dont know the area. He offers me a smoke. I emphatically say no, and wave my hands in front of me saying no. He says something about business. I ask him to repeat himself. He says buisness. I say business? He says business sex. I say what?? He says sex. You sex. In horror i shout fuck off. I storm off and then turn around shouting after him what the fuck. He walked away. I’ve felt humiliated and disgusted ever since.
Recently I was at a work event/dinner with my husband, we were sitting at a table of 12 people and I was the only woman. So I was already starting to feel a little bit uncomfortable as people were mostly talking over the top of me (I’m kinda short). Recently, my husband has grown a beard, which I don’t mind and encouraged. During the dinner one of the men turned to my husband and said “Like the beard. Glad to see you wear the pants in the relationship”. It seemed only small and no one noticed or said anything, but it really frustrated me that not only did he assume my opinion for me but saying such a casual sexist comment that encourages male domination. But what I was most disappointed about was that no one said anything. Including me. I felt so ashamed and angry with myself that I did not stick up for myself and say something in the moment, but I was feeling so small and could not find the words. When I came home I confronted my husband about it, he said he did not even realise the comment. We watched the ‘everyday sexism’ ted talk and the ‘Why I’m done trying to be man enough’ ted talk. It was actually a very uncomfortable conversation but afterwards he said that he has ‘heard me’. Whether I’m there or not I hope that next time he hears locker room talk he will notice it for what it is and have the bravery to say something.
While travelling abroad on a work trip, my boss let me know that in choosing between me and a slightly better qualified candidate, he hired me because he like my ass. “Got to have something nice to look at when you are away from home”. He also commented on my hands, “nice hands, I’d like to see them round my dick”.
I worked at a flower shop, and on a slow day my male boss/owner suggested I put on a bikini and and stand outside to drum up business. He tried to sell me the business for 3 times what it was worth, and refused to show me the profit and loss statements from an accountant. He typed up his own ‘earnings’. Needless to say, I walked away completely.
I’m Native American and wear my hair traditionally long. I often endure “wolf whistles” and catcalls from male drivers who mistake me for a woman. I also walk for my health on the local university campus and I recently noticed that I was apparently being stalked at a distance. Being a guy, I generally worry about guys wanting to pick on me, or wanting to fight. The guy following me kept at a distance, but followed me everywhere I went. I finally realized he also thought I was a woman (I had on thick winter clothing, and all he saw was my hair). This type of behavior would severely hamper my efforts to exercise if I were a woman. Because of my work schedule, I have to walk after dark (during the winter) and this has become a common occurrence. I have every bit of empathy for women who must put up with this type of suspicious behavior daily.
I’m 63 years old. I was walking along the street recently when a car went past and a bloke shouted “bitch” at me..
A guy just came up to me and said “did you know that women can orgasm?” sounding genuinely surprised. I responded sarcastically “oh my god sex is for women to enjoy too??”
I was around 2 minutes away from my house and as I walked home, a boy taped me on the shoulder and told me to follow him, me being a nieve 13-year old I followed. I was suddenly in his house, I tried to escape but he shut the door behind me. He lead me to his bedroom and told me to sit on his bed. I sat and tried to make an excuse to leave but he kept interrupting. He started asking me questions- like I was being interrogated. Then he stood up and started undressing, I knew what was coming next. I stood up and said I cant do this and he said why me thinking on the spot said I liked girls and I was currently in a relationship. Then he got angry and said why did you lead me on them? At this moment in time, my head was in survival mode and I just said I didn’t and I had to go. I am 15, nearly 16 and I am worried that I will ‘lead boys on’, I am constantly worrying that there will be one day where I meet a boy and he will believe that I am asking for it. I ran home and cried about what nearly happened, I felt so alone and that I had nobody to talk to. The moment wasn’t even the worst thing, I see this boy once a month and I have to try to ignore it but secretly I know that he’s done it to many more girls. I walk past his house every day and it is a constant reminder of what happened. I have isolated myself from all my boy’s friends just in case any of them have the wrong idea but at the cost of losing some of my closest friends.