leo

I’m 13 years old and I regularly get shouted at by boys and girls from the state school a few streets down from mine (an all girl’s private school). I have short hair and identify as queer and when i walk home from school, I get called ‘gay’ and a ‘dyke’. A few days ago some girls ran after me and my friend (who also has short hair) and pointed at two boys who were part of a larger group. She told me that the boys found us attractive, while the large group and girl next to her giggled. Sensing that this was a joke- boys tend to find me ugly because of my short hair and masculinity- I just said ‘I’m gay’ and walked away with my friend. The girls squealed so loudly, I felt genuinely apologetic for the public. I hate being humiliated by groups of teenagers and made fun of by boys for not being ‘feminine enough’. I’ve had a lot of issues with my gender identity and it makes me sad when i get called ‘he’ in an insulting way or when the idea of a boy liking me is ridiculous to others. I got catcalled by four men in a furniture van on my way to Sainsbury’s and my mum has experienced the same kind of public humiliation being french and made fun of for that. It’s happening more and more often around where I live and I’m realising that I have to be cautious of who I tell about my sexuality. I’m afraid that I will be physically hurt if I walk home from school alone, but there is no alternative way to walk home- I have to walk past the hill at the bottom of the school where they gather.