Wendy

I am an attorney and was working with a male colleague (P) in a different firm (same side of the case). The court appointed an attorney-ad-litem who was a male attorney. The ad litem would speak normally to P but to me, when I questioned the ad litem on several points of fact he overlooked, would make comments like, “Perhaps you didn’t learn this in your first year contracts class,” and the never out of date favorite, “Let me explain this to you, or maybe P can help you with that.” I would frequently have to say to him that he didn’t need to speak to me the way he did. P would often be the point of contact because while P didn’t like the way I was treated, P felt he had to play the ad litem’s Man Game. The case was settled in mediation, and on the way out the ad litem gave P a hand shake and when I stuck out my hand for a shake he moved in to hug me. He should have just patted me on the head, it would have been the same thing.