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I was a social work student on placement in child protection. I worked with a mother who was the victim of domestic violence from her previous relationships. I’ll call her ‘Kate’ for anonymity. Kate was supported to end an abusive marriage, in which she experienced physical and emotional abuse. Kate was pregnant at the time and developed mental health issues, much like post-traumatic stress, as a result of her most recent traumas. Kate had a baby but her deteriorating mental health meant that social workers became involved. The social worker allocated to her was an older man with years of experience. He did not believe that she was the victim of domestic violence, and went out of his way to track down the father – in order to bring him into the equation. He is a strong advocate for paternal rights. When I raised concerns about this social worker’s denial of Kate’s domestic violence reporting, I was not listened to. This led to a series of meetings where my own mental health and domestic violence experiences were used to deflect blame from the social worker. My university tutor even told me in private “this mother may, after receiving some mental health support, realise that she is not a victim of domestic violence”. This advice comes from a university tutor who presented herself as a feminist and member of the LGBT+ community. I have found a Women’s Aid campaign that calls for no assumption that perpetrators of domestic violence should have contact with their children. But, this starts with getting rid of victim blaming and the everyday sexism that goes unchallenged in social work. I urge anyone reading this to support the Women’s Aid campaign: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/no-assumption-child-contact-perpetrators-domestic-abuse