Tag Archives: Shopping


Seen “tablets” on littlewoods called “man up pills” (they’re actually mint sweets) they’re advertised as a joke item, however the label has things on it like “tablets to be taking when acting like a big wuss!” and “caution; whole bottle may be inserted where the sun doesn’t shine by local nurse” and “pills may cause you to man up and stop embarrassing yourself!” plus “one tablet to be taken with every sniffle.” i have seen an awful lot of products like this in stores recently, such as when i was out shopping during the christmas period and seen a “man tin” for “man stuff like screwdrivers, hammers and beer” and another that said “sawdust is a man’s glitter” ETC. its irking when you’re just out (or shopping online) casually shopping. 😐


I went in with my husband to buy a new mattress because of my back problems (my husband was indifferent), and the salesman only dealt with my husband when it came down to making the final decision, payment, and scheduling the delivery.

Emily S.

I went to the grocery store earlier today. I was alone. I was in the bread aisle looking for some rye, when a man said “You’re a really pretty girl.” I said “thank you” and continued my search for bread. He stepped closer and said, again, “I mean a really, really beautiful little girl….young woman, I mean.” He then asked me if I was married, what my name was, how old I was and where I lived. I said I wasn’t married, lied about my name and where I lived as to be safe, and told him my age. He told me he had two daughters and a couple granddaughters, and told me that he spoils them. He then proceeded to say (in an uncomfortably sexual way), that if I was living with him he’d be sure to “keep me spoiled”, too. He said he was a 69 year old man and that he “never does this”, but he saw me and just “had to” tell me how “beautiful of a girl” I am, “a truly cute little girl”. It was honestly so disgusting and he even became touchy, patting me on the back and half-hugging me. The rest of the time I spent at the grocery was filled with anxiety and I was constantly on watch to make sure he wasn’t following me/wouldn’t follow me home.


Why do they have to call them ‘boy’ shorts all the time? Why can I not be wearing ‘girl’ shorts for once? I mean, I identify as a girl and it was the gender I was assigned at birth, but that’s not enough for the disturbingly sexist fashion industry, cos if I want to wear clothing that is considered traditionally non-feminine, I must refer to them as ‘boy’ clothes. It’s like the feminine version of being emasculated… …Also, why, if they really are ‘boy’ shorts, are they cut so much shorter than ‘real boy shorts’ are? I started to just make my own because I’m sick of getting cut in half through the crotch every time it’s sunny outside. I mean, the whole point is that they’re meant to be comfier than ‘girl’ shorts, right? If they cut ‘real boy shorts’ the same length as they do ‘boy’ shorts for girls, nobody would buy them because they would crush all the men’s balls. Just let me keep my goddamn upper-thighs to myself, would you?! I shouldn’t have to sit at home sewing shit onto brand-new clothes just to make them wearable and making ALL my own clothes while I keep up a full-time job isn’t really feasible. I mean, I can sew, but I’m not THAT freakin’ good. I have the same issue with “boyfriend” jeans. They call them “boyfriend” jeans because a girl wouldn’t wear something that baggy, right? All her jeans would be skin-tight, as it should be, right? Wankers.


It just got to me how difficult it is to find clothing for a pear-shaped body. I am a woman of said body shape. I manage to get by with day to day clothes, i.e. buy bottoms, buy a top one or two sizes smaller, which better be stretchy and/or loose fit. But coats are an absolute nightmare. I live in Canada, so parka is a must for when it gets cold. It seems like whoever designs parkas has never seen a woman (outside of photoshopped adverts). All parkas are cut straight. Hips don’t exist. So the choice is either a) an obviously oversized jacket bunched up at the top, with sleeves too long, or b) a bomber jacket, which means my bum will be freezing.

One angry man…

(UK) Shopping for school shoes for my children for autumn/winter term. My two boys were able to get good, warm weatherproof shoes. My daughter (age 5) had to put up with a selection of court shoes. All strappy, exposed foot type things. I complained and was told that she could have the boys shoes. Why should she put up with that? Where are the sensible winter shoes for girls? Sends a terrible message for girls who want to play out in the cold/wet with their male classmates…


My partner regularly gets ‘mmm-mmmm’ noises from a security guard at our local sainsburys in Crystal Palace, London. She says it doesn’t affect her, but I’ve known her long enough to know she’s bothered by it.


I went with my husband to buy a new truck. I was down on the ground looking at the rear differential. A salesman came over and asked if I had fallen. We left immediately.


Another intersection of sexism and ableism… and ageism, too, really. I was out doing some grocery shopping in Lidl a couple of weeks ago, in the electric wheelchair I use, and I lifted up a mid-weight medicine cabinet I wanted to buy and propped it over my lap, on the side of my chair, without any real difficulty. I took it to the till queue, and when I moved to lift it and set it down on the conveyor belt, a man I’d never seen before in my life came up behind me and decided to “help” me with it — never asked, never even spoke to me before he did it — and he grabbed the box out of my arms, and by yanking the weight out of my grasp, he dislocated my shoulder in the process. On top of that, if you can believe it, he then got angry at me for calling him out on his behaviour (even though I did it politely) and pointing out that if he hadn’t “helped”, I would not have been injured – *and* he refused to help me relocate my shoulder (a woman of about my age a bit further back in the queue helped me put it back). I am fucking fed up of being treated like I couldn’t possibly ever handle anything by myself just because I happen to be (a) young, (b) a woman, and (c) a wheelchair user! This kind of crap happens far too often, and it’s nearly always men who do it. That said, however, I have neither forgotten nor overlooked a *delightful* incident from a couple of months ago: In that particular instance, a woman about a generation older than I am decided that she was going to “help” me get off a bus, all along talking at the top of her voice and half the time in third person, to show everybody else on the bus how she’s soooo charitable and a better person than they are, helping this poor disabled girl (that was the way she was acting, and it was frankly humiliating)… So I said to her, “Look, thank you for the offer, but really, I’m fine, I can manage without help.” She ignored me at first and went down to speak to the driver, again at the top of her voice so the whole bus could hear, even though I’d already pressed the buzzer to let him know I needed the ramp to be put down at the next stop, so she didn’t need to talk to him at all. I said it again, and a little more forcefully because by then she was actually getting in my way when I was trying to turn my chair around, and next thing I know, she’s effing and blinding all over the place, calling me all the disgusting names under the sun, with ableist insults, ageist crap and some equally nasty misogynistic epithets no woman ought ever to use to another… and all I’m doing is just trying to get off the damn bus and go home, and she’s shouting swear-words at me at the top of her voice… eventually I just yelled back “Oh, fuck off and grow up!” when I was finally off the bus, quietly apologising to the bus driver for the scene – and she had thoroughly triggered my PTSD by then. The closest comparison to that incident with a man? Well, that was also on a bus, but it actually began with him physically assaulting me, after which he went off on a similar verbally abusive rant – but he wasn’t even pretending to try to help me. Just loud, misogynistic, ableist, ageist verbal abuse all over again. I posted that incident on ES shortly after it happened, in 2012. I am so very tired of people who think they have a right to “help” me against my will, almost always without asking, and are not being helpful at ALL. Every single time someone has done that I have ended up with either a physical injury or a damaged wheelchair. And eight times out of ten it has been a man who has tried it. I am just so tired of it all.


I’m looking to buy a new bike. On Saturday I went into my local bike shop to ask some questions and try a few models. I had great service and was treated pleasantly and fairly. Tonight I popped in again – this time with my husband. It was a totally different story. I may as well not have been there, as far as the guy in the shop was concerned. Every time I asked him a question, he addressed the answer to my husband. At one point he looked over at my husband and rolled his eyes as if I’d asked a stupid question (I hadn’t). It made me feel angry and ignored, and was embarrassing for my husband too. It seems the presence of another Y chromosome in the room renders me invisible.