Hello, Laura, Since I moved to a new area I’ve constantly had men wolf whistling at me and groping me on the train I use to get to work. On one of these occasions where a man groped my bum, I told my boyfriend. Once I told him one thing, I told him every incident. I explained to him the countless scenarios I endure on the way to work, on the way to pick our children up or even the casual walk with our dog he got angry and didn’t realise. He told me that I should’ve told him earlier but the fear of him telling me to “take a joke” or ” its a compliment” scared me. After confiding in my boyfriend I felt a lot stronger and confident. So, one very early morning around 5 AM ( The time I leave for work) a man was jogging down my street and wolf whistled at me. So I turned around and howled. he looked at me and who evidently shocked.
a few months ago i was walking down the street alone in the afternoon. I passed nearly by a gay and heard him saying ”ohhh yeah come on, touch me” and things like that. That moment i felt like my head was about to blow so i looked at him and asked him loudly ”did you say something or i misunderstood???” . He was not expecting that, he looked so embarrased and answered to me ”No didn’t” and walked away kinda scary. When i told my female friends about that, they told me that no one of them could ever do what i did ’cause when it happens to them they just walk away, like i did since this day.
When I was 12 years old, I was walking down the street when I saw a group of three guys and a girl standing by the side of the street. As I walked past them, one of the guys suddenly just threw his arms over my shoulder and started saying things to me that I don’t even remember. What I do remember was telling him to “get his hands off of me” and hearing him and his friends laugh at my reaction – as if it was funny to make someone feel so uncomfortable and violated.
The other morning I was walking to work at 7:45am. I was tired. I didn’t have any make up on. I was wearing a baggy black t shirt, flared trousers and runners. I almost want to stop myself here because obviously, it doesn’t matter what I was wearing. what I’m trying to convey is that it was a day where i didn’t care what I wore or what I looked like. I wanted to be comfortable. A man made a sexual comment about me. Obviously this isn’t the first time it’s happened. Because I’m a woman. But I’ve noticed a trend. These men, (and every instance it is a man) say these comments just as there are past you. By the time you have registered what just happened they are metres away. Leaving you petty unequipped to confront them. They are taking so much power from women this way in one foul swoop. I turned to confront him but he was very far away. He had turned back to look at me, waiting for a response. I gave him the finger. Sometimes I’m not sure how to approach these situations. I feel like barking back an insult somehow only spurs on the idea to these bastards that the whole thing is just a fun game of wits and who can quickly think of a better put down. I almost cry with anger at the thought of how entitled these people seem to think they are to make comments about women who are simply being in public spaces. To me, it exposes a complete lack of respect and disdain some men have for the opposite sex. It’s infuriating, upsetting and wrong. A few weeks ago my friend and I were walking down the street and a bus driver in uniform made sexual comments about us. A bus driver. In uniform. Does this mean that if ever I’m on a bus alone late at night, I should be scared because a bus driver might rape me? Some might accuse me of over reacting here. But if this bus driver who obviously had no regard for my consent about being commented on, surely logically, he has no problem in disregarding my sexual consent. The rage.
Got catcalled by a 10year old on a bus today. Was so shocked wasn’t sure what to reply to that. My lack of response triggered an even more aggresive behaviour with further insults. OMG!
A man, about 50 years old, asked me in the middle of a street if I wanted a job as his secretary, because he needed someone who is fluent in German. That was a lie, he actually wanted an escort lady. He asked me how old I was, I said 20. He said: “Interesting, my daughter’s 19. THANK GOD, SHE IS A VIRGIN”. I became angry, left at once. When I stood up, he pulled 400$ out of his jacket and waved with them. Apperently he thought I didn’t take the job because I didn’t believe him that he was able to pay enough!!!
About 3 years ago, I was 20 at the time, I had just moved to montreal and had gone out with a few friends. I was at a bar not to far from my new apartment so I decided to walk home alone. I was wearing my hair up in a ponytail, jeans, a leather jacket, heels. Basically fully covered but still a little bit sexy. A 35 or 40 year old man approached me, asking me for directions. I kindly told him that I did not know where that street was. He then began following me, walking alongside me, asking if I wanted to go dance the salsa with him. He was being persuasive, and at one point started putting his hand around my hips and bum. I was terrified to do anything, scared that he would hurt me if I was too rude. I Would try to brush his hands away from me but he kept going. I asked him to please leave and let me go alone. He said things like “no, no, you shouldn’t walk home alone” “I’ll walk you home, don’t worry about it”. Me being, at the time, a naive suburban girl from a smaller city, I thought it would be a good idea to walk up a road that is in a very rich area in montreal, thinking it would be safe. Now I know to always take the main roads with lighting and people, even if it takes a little bit longer. The man was still following me up the dark, empty street. When I started standing up for myself and raised my voice at him to leave me alone, he said something like: “just a kiss, a kiss before I go”. He grabbed me and shoved his tongue dans my throat, I felt completely trapped in his strong grip. I succeeded in pushing him away, and saw a cab at the red light a few meters away. I ran to the cab and got in. There were 2 or 3 clients in the cab already, I apologized and told them a man was harassing me in the street. The driver and clients, all men, did not say anything about it, did not ask me if I was okay and did not seem angry or disturbed about it. They dropped me off a few blocks down and let me walk home in the dark.
I got cat called 6 times in one block while wearing a parka that went down to my knees with bulky boots and a scarf covering the entirety of my face.