Tag Archives: Workplace

Seenitallbefore?

Recent events have blown apart the myth that attitudes to women and their pay structures have fundamentally changed since 30 years ago. As long as the same unequal power structures exist, the same issues exist and real change takes time. Legislation isn’t enough. Speaking up isn’t always enough. Awareness isn’t enough. ‘Mentoring’ isn’t enough. Whistleblower policies aren’t enough. (From personal experience) Industrial Tribunals certainly aren’t enough. To really change attitudes, you need strong, ethical,competent leaders in govt and at the head of organisations, who actively support equality and diversity and who aren’t afraid to take action when they find serious misconduct of any type and be transparent about what they’re doing. You also need unions and other independent bodies to support the person or people making legitimate claims. You also need strong scrutiny and monitoring mechanisms to avoid loopholes being exploited and backsliding back to the status quo.

CK

Just explained to a manager of a shop who, in the space of 10 seconds selling me a pint of milk, called me “My Love, “My Darling” and “Dear”, that I found hime extremely patronising. Went back to work with the office milk only to have the door hekld by a young man who answered “OK my dear” when I thanked him. Grrrrrrr

Sarah Hamble

I was at work and a woman walked past the office in a electricians uniform. Two men in the office, one of which was the company director, stood by the door watching her making comments about her uniform and how it fit her well. The company director then said to the other guy, you should go Harvey Weinstein on her.

Ruth C.

I was in the Cayman Islands on a research assignment. It was my first night out with the girls and I didn’t want to be a “party pooper”, so I agreed to meet up with people at a local outdoor bar/restaurant. There was a man, pretty drunk, at the bar where we met up. The man approached and immediately offered to buy me a drink, in fact, to buy all my friends drinks if he could sit with me. I was reluctant to stay around him, but the friend I was with thought it was funny and started laughing; and b/c I didn’t want to be the Debbie Downer, I agreed he could buy me an OJ and my friend got a Bloody Mary. I stuck around out of obligation and listened to him say every “nice” thing he could about me – how beautiful I was (I don’t think I am); how much he admired my facial features; how he loved me; how he was going to leave his wife for me. I prayed he wouldn’t try to touch me. I finally felt creeped out enough to leave the bar to another corner of the beach, praying he didn’t tail us. He didn’t, but the next day while I was working a survey on a local road, he approached me again and said we should run away together. I was working the survey on that part of the road alone and I immediately got chills. He looked to be at least 30 years older than me in a pickup truck and I a young female on a deserted roadway. I acted chill and talked him off, saying I had to get on with my work and it’s too bad we couldn’t hook up – maybe next time. I didn’t feel safe outright refusing him while alone. After he drove off, I immediately found and told my research coworkers. They promised that we’d walk the rest of the surveys in pairs from then on. And I spent the rest of the trip actively avoiding situations where I thought I might see him again.

A Murphy

I worked in a temporary position for a well known charity. I was told by the Director that I would be given a permanent role if I impressed him. A month later I he sheepishly told me there was no position. Two of my colleagues told me he had let them know it was because he found out I didn’t like men and couldn’t get anything from me. I wasnt in a position to complain because of my contract. After I left another young girl was hired.

Kay

I was made to feel uncomfortable in my own work place, whilst on a night out that I wasn’t working. I was in the VIP complex within the nightclub/bar a bloke that had offered to buy us drinks that we had previously been chatting too was carrying around a magnum bottle of vodka. He offered me some and even though I said ‘no thank you’ – he poured it in my cup and then over my hand trying to stop it. He then spilt the vodka down my trousers, he got down on his knees, held my ankles and licked the vodka up my crouch. He wouldn’t let me go, his mates behind him where in fits of laughter. I was so shocked I just walked away whilst hearing them shouting ‘waaay’. Upon telling my friends I was told he played for a rugby league and there was no point in reporting it. When I thought about telling the manager on shift, I felt too afraid as he too on nights out had played ‘How to pull a pig’ and had behaved in a similar manner. The bouncer I spoke too didn’t seem too bothered, even though I had worked with him for over a year. – When will this stop? How bad does it have to get before someone realizes? – We must stand together.

From India

My boss only hires women. There are only two women in the office now, my colleague and I. He doesn’t take advantage of women sexually. He does take advantage of us emotionally. He has told us multiple times that he can only deal with girls because they are sweet and docile and ‘listen’ to him. Then he just gaslights us(we only realised it because we worked together to uncover his lies). Verbally abuses us every single day. Threatens to beat us (never actually does.. atleast so far hasn’t ). Humiliates us in public. Has openly made sexist remarks about other women in front of us. Does all this and says he can only hire women because they stay longer in his office. I am only sticking around because I need a year’s experience certificate.

Louise

I am only young and had just started a part time job on weekends to earn some money instead of relying on my parents which is normal. Until my boss became very friendly and interested in my life, but being young and naive I thought he was just being nice! Until I started getting texts saying how beautiful I was and how he wanted me to meet him. This continued and I began feeling scared and pressured I didn’t know who to turn to for help. It ended with him kissing me multiple times and me crying myself for nights I end, I’m still scared of this experience and it still haunts me to this day. Unfortunately I am still at the part time job and fear it every time I walk into the room I get scared every time someone messages me incase it happens again.

AC

A few years ago, I was working in central London. There was a manager in the office who I always found creepy, he would sometimes make suggestive and inappropriate comments. We were working on the same project and one day we both had to start work at 8am, which meant we would be in the office before anyone else arrived. That day I got to the office just before 8 and he was already there. He said ‘hello’ in a very suggestive way and had a creepy smile on his face. I sat down at my desk and as I did so, I noticed that he was staring at me intently. He didn’t stop staring, so I just tried to ignore him and make myself busy by turning on the computer. I felt really flustered as he hadn’t stopped staring at me, still with the same creepy smile. He could tell that he was making me feel uncomfortable and I know he was doing it deliberately as he suddenly burst out laughing. I knew then that he enjoyed the fact that I felt uncomfortable and he was taking pleasure in it. I always disliked him intensely after that day and dreaded having to work with him.

Anon

Bumped into an old colleague I haven’t seen for a while. He asked me what I have been up to. I said I had another child. He said, he meant what have I done that’s interesting.