Tag Archives: Workplace

Madeline

When I was 15 two older boys gave me alcohol and took it in turns to rape me then told everyone at school and college I had consented and boasted that money had changed hands, that they had pumped me out to eachother. They since tried to introduce me to other men under the same circumstances, but knowing what would follow, I fled. I was at uni a few years later when I told a guy *no* and he paid no attention. I have been in numerous night clubs where I have been groped, fondled, and shouted at by complete strangers. I have had sexual expletives yelled out of cars at me. I was sexually assaulted when working as a care worker, and currently on my welding course one man thinks it’s ok to talk about my vagina repeatedly. Being a woman is a hard job and we are viewed as the “weaker” sex. I don’t think so.

Anon

While at a mental health daycare centre, some of the men and boys got into trouble with the group leaders for looking up porn involving images of women on the computers. Why the males had to look up these images in the early afternoon on a week day in an open workspace and not at home late at night in private in their spare time is beyond my understanding. None of the women (even ones with severe learning disabilities) dared to look up porn on the network computers at the centre. Lots of visual porn seems to be tailored towards a male audience anyway. The men who looked up the porn on the computers were yelled at by the female group leaders and banished from the tuck shop. The men were then told by the group leaders that they could only marry and have one partner during their lives because that was what Jesus said to do. I know that these men transgressed by looking at porn during daytime working hours, but the way the female group leaders were trying to police the men’s private lives and script their sexuality was very disturbing. I have to say that the female group leaders’ involvement seemed unethical and interfering, but I was powerless to do or say anything about it. They sometimes said that the men were “useless” and “lazy” at doing certain tasks compared to women which was incredibly sexist. Some of the men tried to talk to me about porn and how they thought women should behave in the bedroom. At the same time they were parroting the “everyone has a special destined someone of the opposite sex to marry” lines said by the female group leaders. Everyone was automatically assumed to be heterosexual and straight there because well “Jesus says so”. It was bloody disturbing. I never signed up for this: I was an atheist. It didn’t matter how many video games I played at home or what my interests were, the female group leaders referred to me as a “sweet girl” even though I was a grown woman. Disturbing as heck. I honestly would have been better off talking to a brick wall and listening to the echo than hearing all the tired out gender stereotypes trotted out by the “God Squad” at that place. At least when you talk to a brick wall, you get some sense echoed back, unlike what I heard at that “mental health” establishment. Never ever going there again. It isn’t that I dislike Christians, some of my best friends in the past were Christians! The difference between them and the mental health group leaders, my friends unlike the group leaders didn’t try and shove their religious beliefs plus gender stereotypes down my throat. My Christian friends in the past let me be me and didn’t interfere in my private life because they were decent caring people!

Dumb

Moments before his surgery, an elderly man in Savona refused to be operated on when he discovered the anaesthetist on shift was a woman. The 70-year-old was to undergo surgery at the San Paolo hospital in Liguria last week to repair an inguinal hernia. Medical staff had performed the required pre-surgery x-rays, blood tests and electrocardiograms, but as he was being prepped in the operating room the patient suddenly refused to let surgery to his groin area proceed unless the anaesthesia was administered by a man. “Buongiorno. I am the anaesthetist you don’t want. Would you like to tell me what the problem is?” the doctor told him. The patient said not to take it personally but he had heard “talk” about the hospital’s female medical staff and did not want to be treated by one. His wife also joined the argument, insisting “no woman would lay a hand on him.” Frustrated, angry and with five other surgeries lined up for the afternoon, the anaesthetist and lead surgeon called their superiors before returning with a solution. “This is not a private clinic and you can’t choose your doctor from a catalogue,” she told the patient. “We have this team on shift today, so if you are fine with that then let’s go into the operating room and do what we need to do, otherwise, the head of surgery suggests you sign to be dismissed and be treated in a private structure where you can demand whatever you like. Good day. ” The man signed the paperwork and left the hospital. Head of Anaesthesiology Brunello Brunetto defended his medical team, saying “regardless of their gender, all the anaesthetists have my trust and are all fully capable of fulfilling their role.”

Tom

I wanted to get into medical school, so I tried to get some experience by volunteering at a local place that cared for kids with Down’s syndrome. I got an interview there, but was rejected. I went back to ask why, and on the down low one of the interviewers told me “we couldn’t be sure you wouldn’t sexually abuse the Down’s syndrome kids. We don’t really take men on as volunteers”. I thought about making a complaint. But I didn’t, because if I kicked up a fuss and they did start taking on men, what if one of those men really did abuse the kids? I’m still not sure how I feel about this- they were definitely sexist, but were they right? Men really are much more likely to sexually abuse kids than women. Was I sexist against men for kind of agreeing with the interviewers?

Sou

Today we were having a chat with few colleagues and one them was asking if we thought that there were more gay men or lesbians. I said that I don’t think there will be much difference in terms of numbers, then he replies” I am sure there are more lesbians, now with all these feminists ” me: what? I can’t believe you said that. -him: ” I have friends who went to events organzied by feminists and they were typically saying that men are trash and that women should just dare each others. I was do disturbex by the fact that such ab uneducated man had this kind if rhetoric!

Anna

I’m in my mid thirties currently doing a job that a man in his 60s had previously been doing. I’m paid approximately half the wage that he was receiving!

Middle Aged Fighter

Today, I was discussing with our finance manager (male, 20 years younger than me, with whom I have had a good business relationship) my decision to take a step back from my full time job and do contract work for the company in the fall due to frustration with how the division I am in is being managed. This way, I get to control what projects I accept, and get some freedom from working under a difficult supervisor. I can afford to do this and it seems a sound way to protect myself from stresses that don’t really need to be affecting my work.This supervisor isn’t going anywhere soon and I have had no success trying to get my point of view across to senior management. He has agreed with me in the past that the current supervisor is alienating good workers and we have lost other good staff because of this. It totally took me aback when he said that my decision is why he has always disliked women managing projects because they quit when the going gets tough. I must have looked at him strangely, as he backed off and said that he always had considered me “one of the guys” because although i was passionate about my work I was never “emotional”. He was disappointed in me because my decision “showed weakness”. I have never heard a sexist word from him before and I would expect someone of his generation to be a little more enlightened. My solution allows me to still work in a job I enjoy and allows the company to still use my skills. Why is this “weak”? Why is being or seeming to be “one of the guys” a good thing, a thing to be desired? Before you assume that I work in a guy-heavy field like tech, I don’t – I work in the child care sector (!!!)

Angela

Today, at work, we were talking about who asked out who, and if we’d rather be asked or ask. I’ve said I don’t need to wait a guy to ask me out, I can do it by myself (it’s not a rule, it can happen, it cannot, it depends on the situation). The answer was: you’re pretty, you don’t need to do that. When I tried to encourage the others women on the table to do the same the answer was: you’re pretty, so you’ll probably never be rejected, so that’s why you do that.

Jen

Yesterday, a colleague and I (both late 20s/early 30s female) conducted an audit in our workplace, auditing a colleague in another department. We had to stop the audit part way through because he was so aggressive and hostile, claiming that we didn’t know what we were talking about and we had no right to question him. Ironically, we are the two most qualified and experienced auditors in our company. Both with advanced degrees. We’ve both conducted hundreds of audits each, including on construction sites and waste processing plants. Neither of us have ever had to stop an audit part way through for any reason, let alone being aggressively told we don’t know what we’re doing. We are both just so disappointed that a colleague would treat us this way. And angry. So very angry.