Tag Archives: Workplace

JC

Having to deal with the only female manager of the business initiate and drive a conversation about all women being crazy. When I ask to change the topic of conversation in the office because it made me feel uncomfortable I got ‘I’m not scared, I’ll say what I like’. Forced to listen to the conversation move on to how much worse it was for men when women were in their periods. In a working environment. With no HR department.

ZO

A male friend of my recently challenged a women at work who called him a ‘boy’ when addressing him & rightly so. At the time, I challenged the knee jerk reaction with ‘this seems so bad to you & yet it happens to women all the time when they’re called girls & no one bats an eyelid’. To which another guy replied ‘Oh we’ve started something now’. Now I’m noticing all the time someone refers to one of us as a ‘girl’ & it’s crazy how unnoticed this goes by my male counterparts. I just showed one of the posts on this site (superhero one) to the guy who was called ‘boy’ & he was like ‘true’. I then drew his attention to something someone at work said earlier, an older man who to be honest I’ve had bad vibes from before. He waved goodbye to some colleagues by saying ‘have a good evening girls’. I told my friend about it & said if that had been him, it wouldn’t have been the same, thus drawing attention to my point – we get this all the time. He remained silent. Doesn’t make it right, but it’s good to show someone their privilege.

Tay

Having to live forever with the “agressive” title for speaking up to the boss, I got blacklisted from a university where I teach several topics, because I had a firm talk with the director on unpaid hours for work done on behalf of the school with partner chompanies. Result : blacklisted, that a bunch of resident teachers had to lobby and defend my case to allow me back to teach. I would’ve been happy to nver come back and teach there, but I don’t know if that would be a victory for him, or a defeat on my behalf. Still don’t know what to make of it. Sexism that makes one’s head spin.

Tessa

I (f) work at a translation agency. A while ago, I made a large quotation for one of our clients. The client (m) accepted the quote and my manager (m) would handle the translation project. I emailed the client to tell him that my manager would manage the project, and that my manager would get back to him asap about the deadline and some of the client’s questions. My manager completely forgot to get back to the client, and about 1 week later I received an irritated email, addressed to me and with my manager in cc: the client hadn’t heard from me in a week, he wanted more information and stressed the fact that the project was very urgent. My manager suddenly decided to reply, apologized for his late reply, and answered the client’s questions. The client responded happily, thanking only my manager and ignoring his blunt mail to me.

Katie

manager: “I need a strong volunteer to help move some boxes from the yard.” me (a 20 year old woman): “I’ll help!” manager: “Um maybe you should let one of the boys take this job Katie.” Great.

Carina K

Four years ago, I was working as a “valeter” for a BMW Dealer in a small town in county Wexford. I had been working for them for four months when a manager started to call me “honey”. As I found it rather inappropriate in a work place, I asked him to call me by my name. Soon, a very arrogant, stuck-up person (another manager) showed up, and started to explain that here, in this country ladies are called like “Hon”, “Sweetheart” or whatever men want to call them, so he started to call me “Darling”. From that day on, this manager visited me regularly at work until he managed to got me to understand that it would have been much better for me to become his “Friend with benefits”, if I had wanted to keep my -otherwise- underpaid and hard physical job. I relied on this income as I was married and had a family, however, he (or the company who was backing him in his filthy blackmailing, and was covering his acts in every possible way) was never interested in my being married. They never accepted this as an excuse for not being a “Friend with benefits” of anyone. I just wanted to work, earn money and spend it on my family. I did not want any trouble. They were extremely happy with my work, so I calmed down a bit when a 20-year-old girl arrived to the company (I was 39) to participate in a 9-month Internship as a receptionist, and this manager had found another amusement for himself in the person of that girl. (Literally, they spent the whole day together, the company supplied them with enough time, car and fuel to travel to the next town where the girl lived so that they could have sex instead of being at work. I was happy with that because I thought, at least, I would be left alone.) The only thing I was not happy with was that when this girl went on holiday this manager came and started the harassment over again as he needed someone for sex. As I could observe it, he was literally “bathing” in the fame that he was a “fashionable womanizer” who could bother anyone unpunished as he was completely a beneficiary of nepotism at the company I worked for. Being famous for having more than one “Friend with benefits” simultaneously was his real enjoyment, rather than having sex with them. So, he often came and pretended in front of my colleagues that I was one of his “Friends with benefits”. I was warned for the second time that it was better not to fall out with that manager, so to save my job AND ONLY TO SAVE MY JOB!!! I slept with him for the second time. When his girlfriend returned from holiday, she was not even jealous of me when she heard the story of how his boyfriend had compensated himself when she was gone – which showed me the fact that how high expectations she might have had regarding being the girlfriend of an accomplished 40-year-old businessman. Probably, a job or a marriage had been promised to her. To make this story short, I could not take the harassment and humiliation anymore as he and the whole company objectified me as his spare sex-toy, so I quit my job. The most interesting part of it is that my reputation has been ruined, I could not get a job ever since I left them. No one will give me job here because nobody wants to piss them off by employing me. I am the one who lives with “stigma”, my life is broken, and I needed 4 years to recover and tell this story. I think this is some “form ” of rape when someone is blackmailed with their job. And the person, that committed it on me, had spent two years stalking me afterwards. I did not do anything wrong except I did not report his threatening messages like ” (I quote)…believe me you don`t want to fuck with me, or you will be sorry!…” to police at all. Thank you for reading my story, and …LADIES, LEARN YOUR LESSON OF IT!!!

Emily

My (male) coworker and I have identical job titles with identical job roles, and are the same age with the same work history/duration. So when he told me his salary (surprise: it was higher than mine), I compiled a list of my contributions, and went to my boss to ask for a raise. After 3 months of waiting for an answer, I was denied: “I don’t have enough experience to justify a raise.”

Jess

I sent an email to Man 1 with a question about something I was organising with Man 2. I cc’d Man 2 and explained we were organising the event together. Man 1 replied, answering the question and giving some information about the context that was totally not needed, as it was the reason I was emailing him. Despite the fact that I had emailed Man 1, the reply was set out in this format: “Man 2, ” “Woman, ” I wouldn’t be upset by providing the information but the fact that he specifically addressed it to me, while giving the useless information to my male colleague has really upset me. Coincidentally, I knew the information as I’ve been in the organisation for almost 3 years. Male 2 has been in a few months and may not have found it out yet.

Eleanor

From the ages of 16-18 I worked in a cafe in my home town. The guy who came with our deliveries used to make me feel quite uncomfortable and used to flirt with the young staff (all around my age). He was in his 50’s and used to say ‘if I was only 30 years younger’

Harriet

So, I’m married to a farmer- which makes me a ‘farmers wife.’ I have a degree in agriculture and successfully ran my own farm for 6 years but no matter. I can handle all of the sexism sent my way- alot! but i have just had a daughter- and from day 1 of her being born, this perfect little baby all i hear is ‘you’ll need to have another one then, a boy to take over the farm’ or ‘oh poor you my sister had daughters too’ I AM A GIRL so how is this acceptable to say to a girl? and its not just from men but other women too. Essentially my daughter is not good enough…