When I was in college, I worked at record store. Yay retail! Everyone always thought working in the music store in mall in the late 90’s must mean you’re a really cool person.
Several of the store managers were female, one was male, I got along well with all of them. Cherri was always the most friendly to me. As time went on there Cherri started making more and more physical contact with me, a touch on the hand, a hand on my back while looking over my shoulder. She invited me out after work multiple times to go have drinks with her and some friends. I was just 21 at the time. I politely declined these invitations.
Then, one evening some of my friends were planning to get together after the store closed so I agreed to go with them. The crossover of friendships led to Cherri being invited as well. I was a bit uncomfortable but tried to make the best of it and enjoy myself. Cherri bought me several drinks that I did not ask for. But I drank them because I didnt want to be rude. She was my boss after all. After the second drink I began to feel very drowsy and lethargic. Cherri immediately volunteered to take me home as I seemed to have “had too much to drink”.
She put me in the passenger seat of her car and convinced me to give her my address and directions-no gps or smartphone waze at this point in time. Once at my apartment she took me inside and partially undressed me and put me in my bed. I thought that was the end of it and passed out. Not sure what time I awoke, but it happened because I was fully aware yet unable to move or do anything about it, Cherri had removed the rest of my clothes and was performing oral sex on me. She then straddled me and said “don’t worry I’m on the pill” and proceeded to have sex with me.
Afterwards she left. I was off for a couple days but when I went in for my next shift Cherri behaved like nothing happened while continuing to be very forward and physical towards me. Which made me more uncomfortable than it ever had.
I didn’t know what rohypnol was. I learned about it’s effects and how it worked a few months later. Embarassd, and believing 100 percent that it’s compelty impossible for a male to be raped I kept it to myself for fear of how it would be reacted to or being ridiculed etc. I quit my job without ever saying why and found a different job at a completely different location just to get away from the environment.
I understand why women don’t report what happens to them. The feelings of shame and fear of ridicule are universal in my experience.