The Everyday Sexism Project exists to catalogue instances of sexism experienced on a day to day basis. They might be serious or minor, outrageously offensive or so niggling and normalised that you don’t even feel able to protest. Say as much or as little as you like, use your real name or a pseudonym – it’s up to you. By sharing your story you’re showing the world that sexism does exist, it is faced by women everyday and it is a valid problem to discuss.
If you prefer to e-mail me at laura@everydaysexism.com I can upload your story for you instead. Follow us on Twitter (and submit entries by tweet) at @EverydaySexism.
I took my dad out for dinner for his birthday. At the end of the meal, I got the (male) waiter’s attention and asked for the bill. He returned to the table and presented the bill straight to my dad, then came back and offered the card reader to him too – after I asked to pay by card. My dad told him it was presumptuous to assume he was paying when it wasn’t even him who asked for the bill – he just laughed, and I didn’t leave a tip.
When I was 19 and in nursing school on a placement in a psych hospital, on my final day I was cornered by an old male health care assistant repeatedly demanding my number and asking to take me out on dates despite me repeatedly saying “no”. At one point he even stood between me and a patient I was having a conversation with to continue demanding my phone number. My last day of this placement was spent avoiding him at all costs and running out of there when my shift ended (I didn’t have time to say goodbye to colleagues because he was briefly off the ward so I took my opportunity and got out of there). I never reported this because he was so well liked by staff and patient and I didn’t want to jeopardise his career in the UK. It was a long time ago and I don’t really remember any of the staff who worked there but his name and face have stuck with me.
I work as an Environmental Assistant in a Govt org. One day at a meeting someone asked why we didn’t have lunch served and one guy casually said ‘As you can see we have a lady here, maybe next time she can organize’. It absolutely irked me because I was there in a professional capacity, my gender had nothing to do with it. It also gave me ‘ Women belong in the kitchen’ vibes.
When my stepfather died suddenly about 10 years ago, my neighbor asked me if mom my would now have to sell her house in Colorado. By raising this question, they assume that the stepfather was the “breadwinner” of the family and that my mom, a older Asian woman, does not have the financial independence or security to carry on without him.
I sometimes walk my dogs on an old forestry rd where I never see anyone else. Usually it’s just me and my dogs, sometimes hunters drive by but they never bother me. A few weeks ago I was walking my dogs and a man turned up with two dogs. I knew he was someone who lived nearby (but he doesn’t know who I am) and I stopped and chatted with him for a moment about his dogs. After exchanging a few pleasantries I said “ok, have a nice walk” and was about to continue on my way alone when he said he would join me. He didn’t ask, he just said “oh I’ll walk back with you”. Then things started to get weird. He asked me where I was from, where I was going. Sometime ticked in my mind and I lied about both. He told me he saw my car and realized it was a chicks car because of the hair tie on the dash (wtf?) and decided to walk further down the rd. He talked about how one of his hunting dogs was a real killer. All of this didn’t really register until I was well and truly safe. Once I got back to my car he asked me if I wanted to go back to his place to which I ofc said “no thanks”. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough, and now I’m afraid to walk down that rd by myself. 🙁
A few weeks ago I was walking down the street in a town centre and two men walked towards me. I could feel them looking at me, and as they got closer one of them started shouting random names at me. I felt intimidated. I often ignore this type of behaviour in the belief that reacting and giving them any attention would reinforce it. But I wish that I had asked them why they think it is acceptable to shout at a woman in the street.
I was sexually assaulted at my Christmas party, when I reported it to my manager he took all my shifts away to keep me from working with my attacker. I left in the end and now I have no income and I see my attacker working around young girls and women. I’ve reported him 4 times and still waiting for a response.
I was at school, and some boys came to me and tricked me into doing a sexualised pose and sticking out my butt, disguising it as a handshake. It was only two months later until I realised the true nature of their actions
Hello there, I’m in middle of reading your book! I’m coming on 50 this year. I was married, have 4 kids,separated 8 years ago divorced 4 years coming on this year. Back in 2017 with my 3 children we had escaped from my abusive husband with a few bin liner bag of belongings to a safe house. Got a 115 years non harressment order and 115 years restriction order. My ex-husband not suppose to contact me direct or indirect and cannot enter our county. In the past 8 years I had lost counted how many times he had breached the orders. As I had been instructed by Women’s Aid support worker and the local police I had reported all incidents. Non had been forwarded to the Procurator Fiscal which over sees the local police work. Both organisations states non of the incidents are strong enough. Such as a personal GPS detector amd voice recorder sewn into my jacket. A GPS device put on my car. Text messages with quats from the bible where a woman leaves her husband and/or cheats on him worthy to be stoned to death. List is on and on. I do feel completely let down by the police and the Women’s Aid team. My ex is not been arrested as he suppose to be. Every day we living in fear for our life. Thanks for reading our story
There is a man at my office who I have liked for a very long time but never did anything about it as workplace relationships are frowned upon by our employer. At our Christmas night out we ended up kissing and I was delighted. It didn’t go further than this and I was so happy as I really liked him. I thought he might ask me on a date! The following week we were working late, alone, and he kissed me again, which I wanted him to. But this time he took his penis out of his trousers and asked me to touch it. When I said no he called me a tease. Eventually he got the message that I was not going to touch him and he put it away. I feel like I can’t report what happened as then I would have to explain that we were kissing in the office, which was initially consensual. He doesn’t speak to me any more now, and I still have to see him at work. It made me feel really cheap and not safe, as was scared that he wouldn’t take no for an answer. I thought I knew him and he would never make me feel like that. I feel stupid for misjudging him and the situation.