entitlement

Goat

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An hour after matching with someone on a dating app, he asked for my phone number. I said I don’t give out my number until I’ve met people in real life. His response was “Really?”. He was obviously annoyed by this boundary. I gave him the Margaret Atwood quote: “Men fear being laughed at; women fear being killed”. I thought he was smart enough to understand the reasons (explicit pics, harassment, stalking, scams), and we were already communicating perfectly well through the app on our phones. We met for a date which went well until he pushed me to go into uncomfortable detail about a recent sexual assault I had experienced with another date. His response blamed me for not stopping it. I also mentioned that it happened after 15 dates which caused him to remark on the long wait for sex. I decided to go home. His parting words were “I’d ask for your phone number but I’m not going through that rigmarole again”. He called himself a feminist.

Christina

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When I was 16 I worked as a nurse’s aide. I was taking care of a woman. Her husband was around. I was very attentive to them- getting the things they asked for, speaking kindly. After all, I’m a good person, and this was my job. I noticed that the husband started touching my arm and shoulder when I was in the room. He later followed me into a walk-in supply closet and tried to kiss me. I pushed him away. He said, “I can’t kiss you? I thought you liked me.” I said no. He said, “I can’t talk to you now?” I froze. He didn’t leave the closet until an adult nurse walked in.