The Everyday Sexism Project exists to catalogue instances of sexism experienced on a day to day basis. They might be serious or minor, outrageously offensive or so niggling and normalised that you don’t even feel able to protest. Say as much or as little as you like, use your real name or a pseudonym – it’s up to you. By sharing your story you’re showing the world that sexism does exist, it is faced by women everyday and it is a valid problem to discuss.

If you prefer to e-mail me at laura@everydaysexism.com I can upload your story for you instead. Follow us on Twitter (and submit entries by tweet) at @EverydaySexism.

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E

Around 2 years ago when I was 11 or 12 years old, I was on a game where you could send pictures on your story and easily delete them afterwards and a man asked me to look at his story so I did. He had put up a video of him feeling his willy. I stopped watching ofc and he took it down and I can’t remember what happened next but I do know that I haven’t told anyone until now.

Isabel

Year 1 class pupil couldn’t believe he’d lost a race against a girl because “boys are faster and better than girls at sporty things”

Ruth

I was walking to a friends house with 2 other friends. I was walking closest to the road and 2 younger boys, maybe 15, were walking towards us and they stepped into the road to avoid us, the one closest to me put his arm out so as he passed me his arm ran along the front of my chest. I was so shocked I didn’t realise what had happened and by the time I thought I should report it I couldn’t remember what they looked like and decided it wasn’t work reporting.

part of the 97

when i was sexually assaulted, he was one of the first people i called. i cried to him that i didn’t know what to do. i can still hear his cold voice saying that it wasn’t his problem, that he couldn’t do anything about it. he’s never said anything about it. that was two years ago.

Chloe Leanne adduocchio

I was raped at 11 I was at boarding school in Exeter. The year was 2002 the boy was 14. He was very tall and chunky he scared me. I was short and very slim. I tried to keep out of his way as best I could i’ve been visiting one of my friends after the school day had ended as i past this boys room on the way back to where I was sleeping he called out to me i said hello and carried on walking next thing I knew A large hot hand gripped hold of my shoulder and pulled me backwards. I saw the bedroom door frame past me and it first I couldn’t understand how that worked then I heard the door shut I felt the floor beneath my back. I tried to get up but I got kicked and he said stay where you are I want to talk to you. The room stunk I remember it was also really warm in there so the smell was even stronger stale sweat and something else I could not think of describing. He started telling me how much he really likes younger girls they’re always much better than the old ones. I wasn’t sure what you was on about better than the old ones at what? I found out very quickly. Younger girls are better than the older girls at shaking in fear or perhaps it was not saying a Word whilst he pinned me Down rammed his penis his penis between my lips. 20 minutes later I found myself running down a path going away from the boarding house the boys occupied my lips are sore my leggings or not on properly one leg seem to be higher than the other the back with rold over on itself my knickers were wet and at the time I couldn’t understand how they were wet Time I understood because it is dick in my mouth and then fold my leggings and knickers down just enough so he could shove it between my legs and come seconds after penetrating hadn’t registered the pain until I got back to my room and I was looking for a clean pair of knickers there was blood as well. I never told the staff what happened I told a friend months later that was the last I spoke of it for 17 years then I started telling people my story whenever I felt I was able until this moment I have never told the full story I’ve only ever told the part where I’ve had to choke on his penis. I did hear whilst I was at college years later the guy was arrested and sent to prison for assaulting his niece and nephew who would’ve been about the same age as I was when it happened to me.

Josie

I was out with a group of friends having a few drinks after work. One of my male friends had driven there, and lived nearby me. I asked if I could have a lift home, as I didn’t want to walk home alone in the dark. He said, “You’re not cute enough to be raped.” and insisted I take the bus home.

Anon

About 10 years ago, I worked in a secondary school. I wore glasses for the first time at work and, in a supervision meeting, my male line manager commented that I should wear my glasses more often as they made me look more intelligent.

Anon

On a daily basis at work, I have my male colleague – who is at the same level as myself – invalidate my contributes, experience and knowledge due to the fact that I am younger and female. It is only when someone for whom he has more respect – usually someone higher up in the company and usually our male line manager – validates my contributes, that he shows an interest but in a way that makes the ideas his. The same man once described himself as “you need to convince me the idea is mine before I’ll do it”.

Anon

I am a manager, responsible for the work of my team, the budget, the premises and supervising more than 10 volunteers. One of the volunteers often tells jokes and makes ‘funny’ comments which are racist and/or sexist. I get on well with the volunteer and because we laugh and I create an enjoyable atmosphere at work he does not take seriously the fact that his comments are at best inappropriate in the workplace and at worse offensive. I have called him out on his comments numerous times. Each time he either shrugs it off with “you know what I’m like” or “it’s just a joke, you know me I’m a funny guy” or “it’s the way I am, I can’t change”. When I try to have a serious conversation with him he either says something like “I’ve been naughty, have I?” and winks or attempts to change the subject. He is above 70 years old and believes that his behaviour is due to being a different generation. This is not true – none of the other volunteers are disrespectful and they are the same age. Recently I have tried to be more direct. I have said “you can’t say that”, “that is not appropriate for the workplace”. I have even said “there are standards of behaviour for the workplace and I would hate to have to report you”. He regards this as bureaucracy. This morning he said something offensive and I said “I’ve told you before, John, you can’t say things like that. Not these days. Please don’t make me report you”. I was tired and irritable and I could have phrased it better, but after months and months of this behaviour I wanted to try to get through to him directly. He said “bollocks”. I was very surprised (he’s never sworn before) and said, rather sharply, “John, please don’t swear at me. I don’t want to have to report you”. He replied “I like volunteering here. Please don’t make this somewhere I don’t like coming to.” Several hours passed and we discussed work as usual. A few moments ago he apologised for swearing at me this morning. I thanked him for apologising and, probably unwisely, tried again to explain my position. I remembered that in the past he had told a story about seeing a black friend experience racism and had said that he had said “we’re all people”. I reminded him of that story and said that if that was what he truly believed he should be in favour of equality and see that women are people. He deliberately misunderstood what I was saying and said “well, that’s what I believe. Are you saying that regarding everyone as people is offensive?” I said no, that it was his comments that were offensive. He said “well, that’s what I believe, and in my opinion we’re all entitled to our own beliefs and values”. He turned it around to imply that I was depriving him of his beliefs and values. He looked offended and I had to abandon the conversation because I could see that he was coming close to wanting to report ME for infringing his freedom of expression. The fact that he is a volunteer makes it trickier to take formal action or have direct consequences. I hope he will leave, but I fear that will only happen if HE becomes offended by ME, and I risk becoming the bad guy and being branded a bad manager.

A girl (⊙o⊙)

I have just seen this site for the second time and read through some of the entries. I am fucking pissed. I am only a tween, but I worry about being raped, abused or mistreated. We need to start to dissolve lad culture and stop femicide. We have been given voices, so lets use them. To all my fellow sisters, I am so sorry that yo had to experience these things I am seeing. Love yourself with every fibre of your being. Love A girl <3