office

Anna

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I work in male dominated professions and you learn very quickly don’t challenge a male ego and don’t be the bitch in the office or your life will be so much harder. One of the most recent interactions that I found particularly messed up was with two of my male work colleagues. They stopped by my desk, asked how my weekend was (it was fine) and then I asked how their weekend went. They spent it with their kids and they were tired. I said I was happy I didn’t have kids. Sighhhh. Here we go. One asked how old I was (37). He said I looked good for my age and I could still have kids (great he knows about my reproductive capabilities by looking at me). For the record my husband can’t have kids and I have failing health and it would literally kill me to have a child. I don’t mention this for obvious reasons. I simple said I wasn’t having kids. He returned with the only way I wouldn’t have children is if my husband got ‘fixed’. At this point he is so insistent that I should have kids I just agree. Yes my husband got the operation and can’t have kids. You’d think he’d leave me alone after I just agreed with him. Nope. He then said, well – you should divorce your husband to find someone to have have kids with. I just stared at him. Did he just tell me to divorce my husband so I could have children? Children I don’t want and can’t have? Because he thought I should. Yes. Yes he just did. You would think he’d be embarrassed by prying into my personal life so much but nope. If anything he really wanted to ‘win’ this idea of me having kids… anyway possible. I just smiled and said OK. I stared at him with my fake smile until he left.

Bea

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I work in a small office with two male colleagues. The general manager just walked in, greeted both of them by name, had a brief chat with one of them and then left, addressing them both by name. Not once did he acknowledge me, despite me making eye contact and saying hello.

Suzannah

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6 years ago when I was on my way into London to go to a work experience placement I spilt coffee on the shirt I was wearing. Wanting to make a good impression I had dressed smartly for the occasion. Being aware of time, I decided that when my train got into St Pancras I would quickly nip into the Marks and Spencer’s (where I had a vague idea they sold clothes towards the back). There were at least 6 different coloured shirts in an aray of sizes… Alas these were all mens shirts and being a (smaller than average) 16 year old girl at the time, the coffee stained top would have probably looked better. I was glad that they had stocked full lacey lingerie instead though! I was really angry about this at the time and said to myself that I would write to Marks and Spencer’s to complain. I was only just reminded when I went into the same M and S yesterday to buy some socks… Disappointing that there are still no womens shirts (any workwear), lots of mens stuff however and still loads of lingerie. (I managed to get a linen shirt “for holidays” from nearby accessories- if you walk around St P, you’ll probably notice it’s VERY difficult to get anything for working women but VERY easy to get stuff for working men). 🙂

Tessa

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I (f) work at a translation agency. A while ago, I made a large quotation for one of our clients. The client (m) accepted the quote and my manager (m) would handle the translation project. I emailed the client to tell him that my manager would manage the project, and that my manager would get back to him asap about the deadline and some of the client’s questions. My manager completely forgot to get back to the client, and about 1 week later I received an irritated email, addressed to me and with my manager in cc: the client hadn’t heard from me in a week, he wanted more information and stressed the fact that the project was very urgent. My manager suddenly decided to reply, apologized for his late reply, and answered the client’s questions. The client responded happily, thanking only my manager and ignoring his blunt mail to me.

Red

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I’ve had numerous instances of sexism occur in my workplace. Today’s instance was slight – a colleague visiting from a remote office dropped off a package at my desk. The package was not addressed to me and might I add, I am not an admin/office manager. I’ve had our CEO tell me that one of my strengths in my account management role is gifts to clients – I’ve only ever sent one in the year and a half that I’ve been here. I’ve had clients tell my boss to share pictures of me in my Halloween costume after asking me if I like to dress provocatively on the holiday. It’s hard to get up in the morning.