professional

Hannah

One of my funniest experiences of sexism was when I was on holiday in Wales, before mobile phones & Sat Navs… I was with my 3 children & a boyfriend who was considerably younger than me, & needing to find out where a friend’s house was – I left my boyfriend on the street of a small Welsh town, with my children, & went into an Estate Agents to ask for directions. I spoke to the man in there & asked him for directions, I was the driver so to me it made sense to find out where I needed to go. He looked at me, didn’t say a word, then lifted up the flap of the high counter in the office, walked past me, still saying nothing, opened the door & went out onto the street & then told my boyfriend where the place we were looking for was. I was in shock, so I didn’t question what happened straight away, & later in the day, we all had a good laugh about it! But really it is pretty shocking behaviour …

Alice

Singapore. Engineering Consultancy. I met with a gentleman at a conference and we started talking business opportunities private/public partnerships. I work as Engineer for a consultancy and my boss encourages me to do BD as well. The gentleman, 60-something, retired and in private equity, a grandfather to two, and I decide to meet next month to talk some more about possible collaborations. At that meeting, I see him saying goodbye to a young professional. She is Japanese, and I say hi to her in passing. She seems excited to have met with him. I wonder if it is a coincidence that I am like her, only Western and white. During the meeting he tries to compliment me, saying I must be the boss at my firm being so smart and intellectual. I am confused. Do we have a language barrier? (he is Singaporean Chinese) I correct him on my position with the firm and that anything more concrete we need to discuss with my boss. As he proceeds to complement me on more things that are not true or not relevant to our discussion I realize he is trying to make me comfortable and appreciated. We part ways and I wonder why I feel like I wasted my time. I get text messages from him thanking me for the meeting and that I should visit and come cook for him and have wine together. ???!!!?! I ignored the message. During our office meeting the next week I share my experience. My male and female co-workers are dazed. My boss smirks and, while understanding, he chuckles and comments that that it is part of life. Should it? I wish I asked him. Should it? Should your daughter of 19 experience the same as I did last week? She is studying to become a professional in Engineering. Should she be obstructed in her work like that?