sexualising

Ruth

One of the worst memories of my teenage years is the one I have of sitting in the reception of my high school having a headache when a boy who was older than me by a couple of years sat down next to me and draped his coat over my leg and began touching me intimately. I was shocked (this was happening in front of adults) and I didn’t know the boy or how to speak up being only 13 myself. I later told my mother who played the whole thing off as “maybe he just liked the feel of your trousers” Later I began working and having started at only 15 I would regularly be the subject of pointed stares, jokes and sexual comments from male co-workers the term “if there’s grass on the wicket” was bandied about more than once. Manager and colleagues in workplaces would often apologise to me for swearing (as I was the only woman) or ask me to fetch drinks/arrange catering (not my remit) The worst experience in the workplace came later where a colleague who was 30 years my senior grabbed my wrist and pulled me into his lap resting his hand on my rear at a Christmas party whilst he berated me for not having received an order routed through my department. I was a manager he was ranked below me in the company but still felt entitled to touch me. Each of these experiences were intensely uncomfortable and have stayed with me. I’m glad of the opportunity to voice them and show how ingrained sexism is in the behaviours of some in our society

ash

on a school trip i had brought lots of my favourite clothes that i wanted to waer while away, i was especially looking forward to wearing a lacy black top. however when I put it on to wear one day, when i asked other girls what they thought of it they all said it was ‘too slutty’ and that i would look like the ‘slutty’ girls in our year. because they had said this i lost lots of confidence and didn’t wear my favourite top bc other people were telling me that wearing something revealing is instantly giving off the wrong message — when the thing that’s actually wrong is people sexualising a 13 yo girl’s clothes. now im sure the girls arent sexist, many of my freind in the group say they agree with feminism, but still. i think that what happened was sexist because it made my own choice about my own body into something inherently sexual and that would distract boys.