In my 11th year of high school a group of boys in my class were talking about a girl that one of them liked and one of them asked the other if she was into sucking dick and it just makes me depressed. On another occasion one of those boys were talking about a celebrity being sexy and wanting to be with her just because of her looks and one of my friends told him off and he said something along the lines of “don’t girls talk about this stuff all the time?”. I hate them.
Always being called love, lovely lady, or some such other, in a work setting and on a daily basis. Im not precious about it, but think its wholly unprofessional for anyone (but men mostly do it) to disregard your name or authority / status of position, at work. At worst, it seeks to undermine status and authority with over familiarisation, and at best, is just plain lazy. It makes me feel that they view my hard work is worth less because of the lack of respect shown. I am not your love, or anything other than either your boss, or colleague. Show some respect and learn my name. Leading to: talking over you in meeting, mansplaining, ignoring your requests, repeating your ideas as theirs, and eventually these behaviours manifest as actions.
My husband raises his eyebrows at things I say all the time. He will often direct his raised eyebrows at my daughter to get her to join in with thinking that I’m crazy or mad for saying something that he doesn’t agree with. It makes me feel sick that he could do this to her. My friend has just been over for tea and has complained to me about my husband. She said he does the same thing to her (I have never spoken to her about the eyebrow thing). He raises his eyebrows to other men when she has been enjoying herself and having a few drinks. It makes her feel awful and she says she didn’t sleep for 2 nights when he did it recently. And she doesn’t want me to say anything to him about it so now I’m just left feeling awful about the man I married. He is so much more chauvinist than I ever realised. I don’t know what to do.
Thought I’d share because it may seem minor to some, but things like this, no matter how “little” they seem, are important to shed light on. Where: in geography class. Our school is a bit nonsensical and sexist when it comes to seating and has a “boy, girl, boy, girl” policy. So I sit next to a boy who won’t be named for obvious reasons. I’m used to the usual “lad” bullshit, and so are the other girls. But anyway, on Monday last week, the boy who sits next to me begins talking to a boy on the row behind us, someone I’ve actually known for years. They begin to discuss one of the trips they went on the year before, a totally normal conversation. Suddenly, the focus strays onto a female teacher, who happens to be one of the physics teachers. They begin to talk about how she was “flirting” with one or two of the male teachers on the trip, and then began calling her dress “slutty,” asking one another how “slutty” the dress was, and then proceeding to rate this woman out of 10 on her appearance. All while I, someone these people are otherwise perfectly okay with, sit there right next to them along with 3 other girls. They speak like that in front of another female freely, knowing there are no repercussions for their sexist behaviour and language. Fast forward to today, and they start it again. We were all moved into our new science sets in the morning, so we were all asking each other how we did and whether or not we were doing separate sciences. I asked the boy behind us (same boy as last week) what new science teachers he had. He told me, and then began to talk to the boy next to me again, the conversation then turning to a teacher they wanted for chemistry. Why? Because they thought she was eye candy. “I’d just spend the whole lesson looking at her tits and arse,” and then, “let’s be honest, we’d never get any work done in her lesson.” Direct quotes. Sitting there, speaking like this, right in front of me. Just to put this in perspective with some context – in a school in the UK, in the year 2017, these two boys are 14 and 15. Misogyny begins early. Please, if you have children, it’s vital you teach them respect and act as a role model from an early age.
I got to know a guy during a friend’s party in Germany. It turned out that we both live in the same city, and he liked to travel the world, so I suggested that we meet up so I could hear more about his travels. Until today, I am not sure whether he mistook my suggestion as getting together for a date. For me, it was simply two people meeting up to exchange news about travelling. We met, and I suggested going to a café, but he seemed reluctant and instead invited me over to his place. I didn’t have a good feeling about this at all, but since I was always being told that I should try out new things, I agreed, going against my gut instinct. Once we were in his flat, we stood there in the hall, and he came close to me, put his hand on my shoulder and tried to kiss me. I got a terrible fright and pulled away. He backed off, and since I didn’t want to be rude by leaving at once, we had an awkward conversation during which he told me about the women he’d gone to bed with. After that, I had really had enough, was thoroughly disgusted, went home and never contacted him again. Whether you’re a woman or a man – if you’re not sure whether the other party would like to be kissed/wants intimate contact, PLEASE OPEN YOUR MOUTH AND ASK BEFOREHAND.