When I was 14 I was at a festival with friends, I met this boy and we started dancing but suddenly he stuck his hands up my shorts. I was shocked but I removed his hands and carried on dancing. He repeatedly stuck his hands up my shorts until I eventually gave in and let him do what he intended. When he finished he said ‘thank you’ and walked off. I didn’t tell anyone for years because I thought it was my fault. I didn’t know what to do and I didn’t want to bring public attention to us by making a fuss.
I was 16 years old and at a festival watching Post Malone. A friend and I were quite far back in the crowd, it was very busy. A couple of songs in my friend leaned into me and said ‘that boy behind me keeps groping my arse’. We swapped places, as my friend was known for having quite a big bum. However, the boy just did the same thing to me. I tried to stand at a side angle to avoid him, but this didn’t really work so we had to move through the crowd to find somewhere else to stand. Every time I think of that festival that memory comes to mind, before all the fun times we had for the rest of the weekend.
When I was 13, I went to a local festival that was happening. It was fairly big and there was many people there. Being the summer I was wearing shorts and were quite fitting. I had only turned away from my friends for 1 minute when a group of “drunk” men probably in their early-mid 20s walked passed me and squeezed my bum. At first I had no idea what was going on but I just felt so embarrassed after that I went home
At an open air I got groped by a man while ordering some fries at a stand. He was obviously drunk. I got mad, and pushed him away because he tried to do it again. A friend was standing next to me, but it was a festival so those things ‘happen’ and he was drunk and didn’t ‘control’ his own actions. One of his friends came to me smiling and telling me he didn’t ‘mean’ it, it seemed like a joke to them apparently. Since it was the first time that happened to me, I didn’t know how to deal with it afterwards. I just got on with my life. But having seen your video on TED talk I felt like sharing my story. I’m proud that I didn’t completely ignore it and that I was brave enough to push him away! I think it would be good to spread more awareness like you do. That every touch without consent is just wrong. I hope it gets better.
Recently I (w) was at a music festival with my female friend and my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I were holding hands and listening to the music as guy came out of nowhere and kissed me on my cheek. He was obviously very drunk. I shouted at him “what the fuck?” He was too drunk to respond but his colleague just meant “he wants to be friendly”. My friend poured him with her beer and told him to get lost. Whilst the incident was degrading (him using me like that with no acknowledgment of my will) the truly shocking thing was how surprised my boyfriend was. The first thing he asked, was if that happened often… and as I told him that the incidents vary but keep happening, I realized that such things grew to be so normal to me that I don`t even bother and tell them to the people next to me.
I was at a festival with my boyfriend, walking hand in hand(!) when a man grabbed my butt. My boyfriend didn’t see it and I was so shocked that I couldn’t do anything. After he walked away I realized what had happened and stopped. I wanted to run after the man, tell him my opinion, ask his name so I could report it to the police somehow. But he was really tall, probably three times heavier than me, he was holding a beer in his fully tattoed muscular arms and most of all he didn’t seem that type who would want to talk with me. I felt ashamed, powerless and mad. I wanted to pour his beer in his face and shout with him at first but that really wouldn’t have solved the problem. Then I wanted to talk with him, tell him what he was doing but I had a strong feeling that wouldn’t have worked either. I told my boyfriend the story and my thoughts about it and he just seemed to not get it. He is the best person I know, he is clever, correct – politically and in other ways too – he is a feminist as well but he still didn’t seem to understand me. And more, he didn’t want me to react anything. In our country, the police wouldn’t do anything, one from every five men who are staring at me on the streets are from police cars, winking or just checking my body. Talking wouldn’t use either, my boyfriend said that it would have just got me in trouble. Maybe he is right. But the feeling of my powerlessness haunted me for weeks. It still haunts me. If it happened again, I still couldn’t do anything. I would have to walk away and hope that we don’t meet again.
Being grabbed by the neck in a choke hold and told by a significantly older male that he wanted to “fuck my brains out” at a festival.