Girls are told what to wear when to wear it and everyone’s option on it, log I want to wear a short skirt or just shorts I can see the eyes on me not even all of them are boys my age (I’m 14) some are older some are younger and it’s very uncomfortable when they fell they need to comment on me and friends body they like they can just comment on the size of out breast or bums or how we’re wearing a slutty outfit it’s just 😐
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Aged 15 I was at a historical lecture day with my school. We went to a talk about 1915 in the First World War and the lecturer was an ex-military author, specialising in the War. He started by asking the question why the picture he had put on the screen was not taken in 1915 – the obvious (to me) answer being that the british soldiers were wearing helmets (which weren’t issued until 1916). A boy on the other side of the room put his hand up but said the wrong answer so I put my hand up to answer. The ex-military lecturer looked straight at me and said in the most patronising tone possible: “A girl! Well this is knew… I’ve never had a girl think she knows the answer before!” Even though I was young I did appreciate his tone and the remark but was too scared to challenge him – my best solution was to answer his question correctly and prove his misogynistic attitude wrong. Afterwards friends and teachers told me how shocked they were at the statement, probably as I go to an academic girls school where girls often know the answers. Looking back I wish I’d challenged him or walked out, but my fear of getting into trouble at school shut me up.
Secondly, walking home from work one day aged 16, I was wearing business suit trousers and a blouse. A man leaned out of his car window and shouted as he drove past that a “girl like me should be wearing a skirt.” It didn’t truly hit until a few days later what had happened. I’ve never told anyone about this incident.
Went to a concert. Man in the crowd said to his friend, “man look at all the hot girls here.” Man then called out to me, “Hey baby….” I turned and as he leered at me as if he was raping me in his mind. I hurried off with no reply. I hoped he hadn’t followed me. I hoped I hadn’t made him angry.
in my local residents association newsletter, they have published a joke about locking a “wife” in a car boot, as well as a dog and then opening the boot and seeing which one is pleased to see you. I’ve seen this sexist “joke” on social media. I can’t believe that it’s been published in a newletter. I can only conclude that this indicates that the residents association is run by a sexist generation.
I am cat called in class, at school, in shopping areas, the streets and well everywhere. however the same boys who are cat calling me are also cat calling me on social media and asking for pictures and when I say no the say that it was all a joke and that i am flat assed and chested or they say i am an attention seeking slut but the next day the cat call me and ‘bump’ into my ass and slap it at times . it does not only make me feel uncomfortable but a bit unsafe.
As a feminist I often find myself talking about the issue of rape and rape culture, and the argument that’s always put back at me (only by men) is that it’s also scary for a man if he is wrongly accused of sexual assault and it could “ruin an innocent persons life” and “some girls are psycho and could make up anything” blah blah blah. This argument is not invalid, as i know some cases where women do accuse innocent men of harassing or raping them when it’s not true, HOWEVER, this issue is DISPROPORTIONATE to the amount of women who ACTUALLY get harassed, assaulted or raped. Men “don’t believe” in rape culture simply because they’ve been conditioned to believe that it’s all just the woman’s fault and that their reputation is far more important than any other issue, Issues such as the attack on women’s bodies that is experienced universally EVERY DAY. Surely that’s an issue we should be talking about, rather than the VERY FEW incidents in which a man is falsely accused. And actually, even when a man is accused of rape and it’s true, the woman is often considered untrustworthy, and isn’t respected or listened to and it’s the man’s “good reputation” that is always put first! I’m so sick of this argument! If men really cared about rape culture then they would do something substantial instead of only care about themselves and their own reputations as men!
It happened in Hampstead, London, near the tube station.
I was waiting to cross the road. A man in his early fifties was standing beside me. Another man fastly walks passed us and we both can hear him mumbling an agresive comment about my looks (I could’t hear it in detail).
The man standing beside me turns towards me and laughs about the other man’s comment saying “he said that because you -something- hahahahaha” (I couldn’t hear exactly what he said about the reason why the previous stranger made a comment about me.)
Shocked by his reaction, and still in the burning shock of the street harrassment I had just been through; I merely laughed back at him in a high-pitched, stressed tone. We both cross the road. He rejoins a woman (possibly his wife) and they start walking together, I was walking behind them. After a one minute intense and violent debate within my mind, I decide this time (after 1436883929668399 times of going through everyday sexism since I arrived in England in January), I’ll do, I’ll say something. Heart pounding very hard, I go to him.
“Excuse me sir. I want to tell you what just happened is not normal. You witnessed a verbal, harassing comment being thrown to me, and you turned to me and openly made a joke about it to my face”.
The deconcerted man raised his eyebrows and, with the tone of speaking to an unecessary, outrageous and deranged little women, he said someting like “Sorry what is it you’re talking about?” His outrageous patronizing air was poorly masking his groing uneasiness due to the questionning look of his woman companion who were raising her brows towards me with a collaborating condescending air without being bothered to even be curious about what had happened.
I answered the man by calmly repeating the facts. All I got was a “That never happened, I don’t know what you talking about”. Burning with anger I just looked at him in the eyes and severely stated “you are right, nothing happened” and left. Behind me, I could hear him saying “have a good day” in a last attempt to make things clear that I’m the psycho talking nonsense.
When I came to him, if anything; I was expecting him to tell me that he didn’t mean the joke as an offense, that I shouldn’t accuse him of being bad intentioned. That answer would obviously have not been acceptacle because street harassment is something to take extremely seriously-the thing to do would have been to either pursue the harrasser or at the very least have the decency to shut up (optionnally make a sympathetic comment showing your anger at the harasser, which is what I do when in the position of witness).
This man simply denied we had ever exchanged a word. You tell me why.
Morality: that’s not a cheerful story but everyone; DO stand up to any form of sexism weither you are in a position of victim or witness!!
Waiting outside a bar with friends (male) for the one with the tickets- why we gave them to the one who’s always late?????? Anyway, these obviously very drunk men rocked up looking for a fight, picked one with the biggest guy there- who wouldn’t fight cos he’d get the blame being 6″ 10 and very big- they called him wimp and said he fought like a girl- they wouldn’t let up so I intervened (being a trained martial artist I know how).One of the guys took a swing at me so I loosened his teeth and blooded his nose- self defence according to the bouncers who seemed to find it amusing that a 5″ 2′ woman could floor a much larger man. Despite CCTV and witness evidence the guy still insisted he was beaten up by my larger friend- I fought like a girl!!!!!!!
I was sexually assaulted at 10 years old by an older boy who “befriended” me at school. I was too afraid to tell my mom, as I didn’t want to add stress to her life. 7 years later, I still deal with panic attacks and anxiety, and have no idea how to get better.
A year or so ago was the first time another woman told me that she was sexually assaulted. I held her so tight. I felt like her mother. She was assaulted by 2 men. Not raped…as if that is some consolation. She was pulled into an alley by two men, they tried to get her pants down, and were interrupted by a cop vehicle with lights going by. She never told me too much detail, and I didn’t ask, I didn’t need to. They ruined that woman. I watched ‘Everyday sexism’ and realised this site was the only place I felt safe enough to share my stories. Yeh, I’ve had a lot of it, started with uncles and adult male friends just being a too friendly, you know? Hugging me, and making me aware of their emotions about my appearance that were too mature and sexual for me to understand. Women get a lot of it, and it’s worrying me. I’m 41 now, but when I was younger, I felt like I needed it. I grew up with it, I thought it was normal. Now I realise just how much of it is objectification, and it’s far from normal. I’ve been called a whore, just by some guy passing me on a scooter. I was walking down the street once, just walking to get my lunch on a lovely warm day, and a guy walked past me and pretended to elbow me in the face. On a ride home that same summer, I rode past a guy and he tried to kick me off my bike. I yelled back asking him ‘what’s wrong with you?’ and he invited me to come back for more. All unreported. Until now. It’s not normal, we shouldn’t be putting up with it.