Sexism

Bethany

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I was walking through the warehouse and saw some male colleagues that I know very well struggling to put a conveyer belt back into a slot in the warehouse. I walked past and joked “do you want me to do it?” (this was funny to me, as I have zero training in driving a truck/any warehouse work). One man replied “you go and brew up, that’s a womans job” (in England this means make a cup of tea). I said “Fuck you” and he said “go on then, whenever you’re ready”. A part of me inherently thinks this interaction was my fault, as I provoked them, and swore at them… but this was surely sexism, right? I will never report this as this company doesn’t take matters like this seriously. I know this because I have made several complaints and reports in the past, to no avail or positive outcome/message.

Bethany

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I was trying to focus at work when two men walked into the office talking loudly. I asked them politely 3 times to please have the conversation elsewhere as I need to concentrate. I was ignored. I raised my voice and said “are you kidding me?”. They looked up at me but then continued there conversation. I stared in disbelief until one man looked up and said “actually Paul, lets go to my office because the smell of period is doing my head in”

Megan

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The other week i was waiting outside of my work office, waiting to be let in by my manager who was taking his time as usual. I work in a setting that is in the middle of the city center and directly leads on to a main road. Whilst i was waiting i tied my shoe, and bent over to do so. The next thing i know i had drawn unwanted attention- ‘Yeah baby thats perfect stay like that’. I instantly felt sick, not that it matters but i was wearing covered clothing, and was doing a very menial task which then resulted in an uncomfortable few minutes until my manager came out. I did not respond to the first advance, sometimes i honestly wonder if they think that will work, that i will just drop down to my knees. I looked awkwardly towards the office door. ‘you are so beautiful, can i talk to you sexy’. At this point he had crossed the road to come talk to me. I replied and said ‘I am just waiting for my manager to come and let me in the office’ (I know i probably shouldnt have admitted that i worked there, but at the time i thought maybe with him knowing someone was coming would make him go away) he still continued to say things, make noises, lick his lips. I just stayed quiet, feeling rude? why did i feel rude? I was being harassed and i felt rude and embarrassed. My manager came out, and let me in, to which he walked away but not without staring back and making weird noises and looks at me. This happened in what was probably two minutes. I shrugged it off and went to work, and only thought about it when i got home. I can tell you what he looks like, because every time something like this happens i mentally make an image of them incase i am unlucky. I hate that this is what its like being a woman. I was just waiting to go into my office..

so done

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i love it when i can count on my hand how many times my dad and brother have cooked this year, yet me not wanting to cook on the night of my exam raises questions of ‘why can’t you’ ive become so resentful towards them that i hope they end up alone and are forced to cook for themselves for once. can’t wait to move out; hope my dad’s girlfriend dumps him. she even makes his breakfast and lunches, I want to barf over the 50s vibes.

Me

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I’m being hauled into HR for the third time for objecting to sexism in the workplace, particularly from one well-connected individual who is particularly fond of calling me an irritable female. So far, I’ve been demoted, told not to defend myself when he is sexist, and been accused by HR of stealing hours by being sick (after providing a doctor’s note) for 8 days in one year (even though my unpaid overtime exceeded my sick days by two full weeks.) All this began after this guy’s nephew tried sexting me in Messenger and was rebuffed. I’m not sure what will happen today, but I’m afraid. HR in the US is there to protect the abusers and retaliate against the victims. Never go to them.

amanda

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in a room of male managers and myself as the only female manager discussing the marketing strategy of our small SaaS company (my department and area of expertise), i was told by the owner (who hired and promoted me to mgmt for my expertise) i wasn’t allowed to have an opinion. later that day, one of the male managers (IT) in the meeting barged into my office with a grievance and began his berating diatribe with “listen here, little girl…” i was 35 with a BS, a double minor and 15 years of experience under my belt. and the company is a self-proclaimed christian company. this is just one of thousands of instances of sexism i’ve experienced. i, quite honestly, have lost count. they happen on an almost daily basis, and with 365 days in a year, they add up quickly.

Civil Servant

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Got some anonymous feedback for an Executive Management course I’m on. One person’s comments said they have ‘significant confidence in her skills and decision making’, and then ‘I think that some people underestimate her and [I] suspect that sometimes this is because she is young and female‘. This makes me angry. I’m grateful to this person for saying it out load, and it really encourages me they don’t think it’s okay and mentally try to dissolve these preconceptions, so at least some others must think the same way. But the fact this is what still women face makes me angry, and demoralised about being in my own workplace.

Claudia

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Hello! My name is Claudia, I am currently in the U.S.All my life I have been told I would never amount to anything and that I would never be as strong as men. I have experienced things such as sexual assault as well as catcalling. When I told someone they said it was because I was not wearing anything (I was in my own home) and that it didn’t count because he “Didn’t mean it sexuallY.”. It happened before with a boy a year older than me who treated me like an object, but “Boys will be boys.” It happened once more by a woman as well. I had been groped in public and catcalled multiple times, and so have all of my female friends. The inequality is disgusting, and we need to fight back! Please understand my story and know you’re not alone, and your story is valid regardless of gender.

CC

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After telling my boss about a string of several sexist, boderline racist and innapropriate “casual consversations” with an older male professor that shares my office twice a month, she shrugged it off by saying “oh he will never change his ways, better to avoid him”. So I now have in my diary the days he is scheduled to come in so I work from home on those days. I might have to change office in the next few months as well.

Cristina Berenguer

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My (now ex-)boyfriend used to treat me like a piece of shit while claiming that he was “a feminist” and saying that he couldn’t stand women being treated in the way they are. He was always sharing feminist videos on his social media. We had an open relationship because he had asked me to (while he always was saying it was because I would not be able to have a closed relationship – aka slut-shaming me). When we were with our friends he made me look like I was the one bossing him around, him being innocent and this poor boy who was always behind me, doing whatever I wanted. He tried to get in bed with friends of mine, while I was in the same room. He raped me through coercion multiple times – including the first time we had “sex”-, he told me my English (which is not our first language) was bad, he told a friend of mine that he was only a 5% sexually satisfied with me. He was obsessed with anal sex and he always wanted to try it with me, when he very well knew I hated it and it hurt a lot for me. In a nutshell, he disturbed my sexual life to a point where I would start crying in the middle of doing it. Still now, sometimes, I can’t have sex with my couple because I can’t stop thinking of that. Never respected my boundaries, gaslighted me and treated me like I was ugly and stupid. Now I have a masters’ degree in Plant Biotechnology and I will start my PhD this year.