Nearly a year ago, I left my workplace, due to sexual harassment. It was a cesspool of chauvinism, microaggressions, and all out sexism. Why did it take more so long to leave? It took me a long time to leave for many reasons. First of all, I didn’t really experience that much sexism for the longest time because I worked part time and was in school. However, once I was full time, then I felt the brunt of it in a concentrated form. The other reasons are, the culture allowed for this bad behavior to flourish. It was a hierarchy, where the management were omnicient and not to be questioned by their insignificant line workers. Basically, I was the low man on the totem pole and knew that no one in management gave a hoot if I, or any other line staff, raised a concern. It also did not help that management was part of the problem. Who do you turn to when management is part of the problem and employee relations blames you for having any problems at work? Another reason is, I do not know of any woman who has never experienced sexism every day of her life. The workplace is a hotbed for such activity. Being a healthcare worker allows for sexism to pervade every part of the working day. Sexism is all around us. It’s like breathing air. It’s just there. It’s a simple fact of expecting a woman to be silent, pleasing, docile, appealing, and an object to be used for power and gratification. I am not saying it’s not wrong; it’s terribly wrong and unfair. Sometimes though, you are taught and learn to swim through and admist the shit because if you try to single handedly to filter the water yourself, you’ll drown trying. Eventually though, even though I was just trying to get by without ruffling feathers, I could not stay silent. However, as you’ll see, even in the era of #Metoo, we are still not believing and instead blaming women, especially those without power and status. Here is a timeline of all the experiences of sexual harassment I encountered. (All names have been changed to pseudonyms to avoid any potential lawsuit.) Harassment concerns experienced by employee known as Employee A: Since spring 2016, phlebotomist A had continually leered at employee A and made inappropriate comments, specifically about appearance and her interest in doing something with phlebotomist A throughout their working time together. In spring 2017, two male employees were party to an attack on Employee A, when a female co-worker commented on the lack of support of employee A’s bra and how they generally all hated her. Neither male employee said anything. In spring 2017 employee A was recounting how she received help from some good samaritans for some roadside assistance with a flat tire. Both Center Manager (CM), and Assistant Manager (AM) asked if employee A had gotten their numbers. Employee A explained she did not need or ask for either of the gentlemen’s numbers because she was not interested and already busy with life. Then the AM called her a whore and laughed, while the CM laughed along. Both were females. In fall 2017 the Medical Operations Supervisor (MOS), a male, slapped employee A on the buttocks. Employee A was so startled that she said anybody else who did that would die. Three male employees witnessed this first incident and said nothing. On 03/31/18, a fellow coworker, approached employee A and explained that a donor called her over to ask if the employee A was promiscuous. She then asked him where he heard this information. He explained that a little birdie told him. On 04/08/18, employee A called phlebotomist B and asked him if he knew of situation on 03/31/18. Phlebotomist B explained that he jokingly called employee A a freak to a donor as a joke in passing. In spring 2018, employee A was repeatedly leered at by a male phlebotomist A and explained “[he] wondered what ‘IT’ would be like with her.” Employee immediately told phlebotomist A that he had crossed a line. He basically told employee A that her objection was ridiculous. He then later approached employee A, asked her not to report him to employee relations, and asked what he could do to amend the situation he created. Employee A told him that as long as that line was not crossed again, then there were no repercussions to worry about. A short while later, this same phlebotomist repeated the same scenario with employee A by leering and then repeating “I wonder what ‘IT’ would be like with employee A?” Employee again told him he crossed a line. This phlebotomist continued to leer at employee A and make unwanted comments. In spring 2018, the Medical Operating Supervisor (MOS) slapped the behind of employee A, even after she expressed disapproval to the MOS. The MOS explained that he could not be blamed for doing so since his privilege of being gay covers him, plus he knew the area of the building he did it in was not covered by the security cameras, so it could not be caught on camera. Another male employee witnessed this account and said nothing. The MOS said to the male employee that witnessed the event, that he was almost gay, so he could be allowed to touch employee A without any repercussions as well and laughed. (Employee A witnessed the MOS touch other female employees inappropriately by touching of breasts or buttocks and make inappropriate comments since Fall 2015, which included the Center Manager, Assistant Manager, Trainer Coordinator, and Operations Supervisor – all who were female and none of whom raised objections.) In spring 2018, the MOS and another male employee asked employee A how she takes semen. They suggested that she swallowed it or enjoyed getting a “pearl necklace”. In order to defuse the situation employee A said that she does not engage in either activity and keeps semen as far as possible away from her. Two male coworkers, came to employee A in spring 2018 and explained that they felt they were sexually harassed by female staff at the center with inappropriate touching and explicit comments made. Coworker A explained that one woman had snapped his underwear and another was witnessed commenting on the size of his genitalia. Employee A also witnessed two female employees comment on how they would like to take advantage of a fellow male coworker B. Employee A expressed all sexual harassment concerns to CM on 04/09/18. The CM explained that she would be speaking to all employees individually to address the importance of sexual harassment. On 04/17/18 a male phlebotomist told employee A that he told a donor he owed him a hand job. The donor said he was not gay. This male phlebotomist told donor he would do it as a thank you anyways. On 04/19/18, coworker and friend told employee A that she loved her as a friend. Employee A reciprocated to coworker and friend that she loved her as a friend. Phlebotomist B commented that my friend would be the butch in the relationship. Employee A told phlebotomist B that he did not need to make the situation sexual. On 04/19/18, employee A dropped her pen and went to retrieve it. A female coworker exclaimed that that was one way to get employee A to bend over. The interaction was witnessed by a male coworker who said nothing. On 04/20/18, employee A witnessed the MOS trying to touch a female operations supervisor inappropriately while she resisted and struggled with him. The MOS then joked that he could be called out on sexual harassment, but then laughed and said that he could never be called out for sexual harassment because he is gay and laughed again. On 04/20/18, employee A showed the CM and the MOS that they had a broken reflex hammer. The MOS then put the pieces back together and started hitting different items to show that it still worked. The MOS then hit employee A in the left breast. Employee A then told the MOS that “just because [he is] gay, doesn’t mean that [he could] do that.” The MOS then told employee A that “yes he could, but that employee A could hit [him] in the nuts” to make the situation even and fair. Employee A told the MOS that she was not going to do that. The MOS then shrugged his shoulders and walked away. On 04/20/18, shortly after interaction with the MOS, employee A called on the CM to ask what she was doing about the sexual harassment situation at work. She admitted to confronting one male phlebotomist, but she had not contacted any other staff members about sexual harassment because she was busy and had not made it a priority. She said that she would talk to the MOS tomorrow and would again make sexual harassment a priority. On 04/23/18 a coworker/friend called employee A to report that the MOS was warning employees to “watch out for employee A because she’s out for blood!” This coworker explained to employee A that the MOS was calling himself the victim, and that employee A was trying to get other employees in trouble for the smallest infraction. Since that time period, all employees who were brought up as concerns to the CM largely ostracized and stopped talking to employee A. Employee A knew the staff had stopped talking to her because she reported the sexual harassment and it made work difficult, if not impossible, and uncomfortable; so she put in her two week notice on April 24th, 2018 and finished out her last day on May 7th, 2018. As you can see, other people were also experiencing sexual harassment at the same time that I was, but I was the only one to speak up and out about it. What I also realized is how many times, there were witnesses to what was happening, but people just stood there and watched or laughed along with the perpetrator. It was also disheartening to learn that women could also be complicit or active perpetrators into sexual harassment as well. Finally, it was sad to see how a gay man used his status as gay to protect himself from the responsiblity of protecting another marginalized group – women. Instead he used it as a power play to explain that his assault of a women does not count as sexual harassment because of his own sexual orientation. After I left this business, I tried speaking to law firms about sexual harassment. Basically, they all told me there is nothing to prosecute. Even though there were clear instances of sexual harassment, apparently they were not egregious enouh to take to court. Good to know for all the females out there that the harassment has to be extreme for it to be worth a lawyer’s time. No wonder the workplaces are still allowed to get away with so much sexual harassment towards women. I certainly also learned that employee relations is not meant to protect the worker, but only the company. When I contacted the woman in employee relations, she told me my concerns were invalid, I was at fault, and I was lucky to still have my job. I cannot tell you how demoralizing it has been since then. It’s left me shattered, realing, and still picking up the pieces of my life. I still have not gone back to work, mostly because I’m still a wreck. Instead, I’ve had to move in with family to recover from this ordeal. What really is disheartening is I finally spoke up, and was gaslighted over my own concerns about protecting my body from any unwanted attention, be it physical, verbal, or fabricated event – and no one in that company faced any consequences for their behavior. So thanks a lot world. This has been another rude reminder of how a woman without power and status is no match for a system of oppression built against her. One can only hope that Karma is real.
