Throughout my early childhood – from before I can remember to the age of about 10 – I was sexually abused by my father. I’m over it at this point, I’ve recovered from the damage and honestly I think it strengthened me as a person to endure that and get through it alone. But anyway, the way that it ended was pretty simple – one day he came in to my room while my mother was out of the house and I knew his intent so I just said ‘no’ and looked at him with a newfound independence [I have no idea where it came from, but I think it made him see that if it continued, I would’ve told someone.]
I hate my father – not just for this, but we have never gotten along and I honestly cannot wait to leave this house and never see him again – but I don’t feel the need to put him in prison. Mainly because none of what happened matters all that much to me in the grand scheme of things – I’ve faced worse before and I probably will again – but what really makes me angry is that I can’t talk about it. Not with other people, because frankly I don’t feel the need to burden those around me with problems of the past, but with him. I want to be able to tell him that it was wrong and it angers me and that I don’t forgive him but ever since that day he walked in to my room, and straight back out again? We haven’t spoken a word on it, neither of us have even acknowledged to the other that it ever happened.