When I was 13, young, innocent, I started using Reddit because there were communities for books I liked and shows I liked and hobbies I had and other than the rampant sexism it was fun. I loved scrolling through everything, having fun, talking to people in comments. One day, though, I stumbled across this subreddit called “teenamiugly”. Basically, people 13-18 would post selfies and other teens would tell them if they thought they were attractive. Now, boys’ posts didn’t get much attention, but girls’ posts would frequently get awards, tons of comments, compliments about anything and everything from their eyebrows to their cheekbones. I, being an insecure child looking desperately for validation and opinions on my appearance, posted a selfie. It was just me smiling into the camera, wearing a plaid shirt buttoned all the way up and a long-sleeved tee under it. I got, as expected, quite a few comments. Interestingly enough, most of the comments actually were innocent compliments from other girls. However, my dms were filled with a 50/50 split of lovebombing and “send nudes whore”. All of these men were 18 or older. Most were in their 30s, and my age was in the post title, they knew I was 13, and they did it all anyway. I got at least 10 unsolicited dick pics from that post alone. And then I made a terrible, terrible mistake. I replied to some of the messages that seemed nice (looking back now, they were definitely lovebombing. I have no idea how I didn’t realize what was going on). And I was groomed. At 13 and 14, I sent nudes to dozens of adult men, and I’m sure they’re still floating around somewhere, probably on cp websites. I never told anyone because I had internalized the idea that it was my fault, that I had goaded these men on with my selfies showing my face and approximately one square centimeter of neck. I’m still too ashamed to tell anyone in real life.
