I was sexually assulted in my second year at university. only a few people know about it. I was on a sports night, with my friends at the same club we always went to. I bumped into a guy I had known for about a week, and he bought me a drink. I was relatively drunk at that point, however up until then I remember everything. however, after that drink he bought me, everything is hazy. I dont remember leaving my friends, leaving the club, somehow getting to his, and ending up naked in his bed. the main thing I remember is regaining consciousness in the dark, with no clothes on and his head between my legs. typing that sentence makes my skin crawl. I remember being so scared, searching for my underwear and feeling so vulnerable. he was horrible the next day, and I felt weird about it for weeks. it was only when I re-read my copy of Everyday Sexism did I realise this event happened without my consent. I spoke to a sexual assult helpline, and they helped me understand that I was sexually assulted. I hate the guy that did it. I hate how I can’t wear the clothes he assulted me in because they remind me of him. I hate how I feel so over exposed in revealing clothes, and only feel safe being drunk around my trusted male mates. I do know though, that it wasn’t my fault, and that regardless of what I was wearing, and how drunk I was, it was entirely his fault about what happened to me.
