friends

LM

A new friend asked me about my day, so I told her that I’d been researching different topics and gave her some basic details. She said to me “you’re a serious little girl, aren’t you?” I’m a woman in my forties and she’s 50.

Rosie

when I was in year 9 I was with my boyfriend who was two years older then me and we were in private when he started kissing me (I had never kissed anyone before) then he started rubbing my lower area and I started crying, he didn’t take any notice of this and continued going. I didn’t tell anyone about this till a year latter when I decided to tell one of my close friends. When I told him his reply was that’s not that bad.

Anonymous

I have a curvy body, i was never really comfortable in it so i barely ever reveal skin. One night my friends forced me to go to the club with them. i felt uncomfortable the whole time. (I don’t drink) i was the DD of the night. A guy came up from behind me and GRABBED my ass. I was pissed so i turned and hit him. My friends dragged me away saying “it happens all the time” “take it as a compliment”. I was furious, i honestly do not understand how they perceive it that way. Later that night, i asked them if that has ever happened to them they said no. They’re both the complete opposite of me: tall, skinny, model like. They told me they get asked out and flirted with but never grabbed. But if it did happen, it isn’t a big deal. I don’t know how they see it that day but i can’t see them the same way after that. This just made me more insecure in my own skin.

Coryn

out with a bunch of friends and my guy friend grabbed my ass and boobs on different occassions when we were out. in front of his girlfriend, too. i was 14, didn’t really know how to feel about it so i kinda let it slide.

AUT

I was maybe 21 when I visited friends in Germany. The small village where I stayed at held a street festival and there was drinking and partying. While I was there I met an old friend of my dad’s. We talked about my father and my family in general and he asked me if he could get me a drink. I did not mistrust him at all so I said yes. The next thing I can remember is lieing half naked on the bed with him next to me. I was so shocked that I grabbed my clothes and left. I was ashamed because I was drinking, but I know that I did not drink as much to pass out from it. And then a week later I received a letter from this guy apologizing and asking me not to tell my father about the incident. I never did…

Uncomfortable interactions

My friends and I were walking into my friends place late Friday night. As we entered, my friends brothers friends said “Woah (whistle) I didn’t know (brothers name) was having girls over.” We are 15, he 19.

Lara

So, this story happened ten years ago, when my now husband just finished school. We were a group of friends, 7 guys and three girls and most of us are still friends today. we did a lot together but also just parts of the group based on different intrests. some of us would go to the theatre while others were playing warhammer for example. my shared interest with h. were trashy movies: action, horror, western, crime- mostly from not-usa (europe, india, africa…) and mystery science theatre 3000. so we met on a regular basis after school in my room to watch a film before meeting the others. since i was 14 however i had something going on with A. – everybody knew that- and a month prior to this events, we became a cupple. Everything was fine. On this day however, we wanted to go to a club even though we were more the bar kind of people. we drank and danced and had a lot of fun. my boyfriend drank a little to much and two of the others brought him home. H. and I still had a good time and stayed for to more hours. on the way to my boyfriend’s house, were we stayed the night, H. started to get very silent, which wasn’t his normal behavior. i felt that something was going on- usual teenage-drama. finally he started talking: so, i have to tell you something. A. shouldn’t have you, he said. i starred at him in surprise. “it’s just that i called dips on you.”. i was speachless. “i think you should know that to consider the relationship. i called dips first”. my now husband and i are still together, even though he “called dips” on me, like i was a bag of crisps.

Mary

Hi, I’m almost 16 and some time ago I came out to my good friend. After I told her I’m pretty sure that it’s not about “The Right Guy” he said that she loves me no matter what but she doesn’t agree with this. So I asked if she had any questions about me, but if I’m being honest I just wished that she would ask about anything, I just wantet to talk about it with someone, but she said that she has some gay friends so she doesn’t need any more information. Well you could say that her reaction was great,duh she said she loves me no matter what! But she also said that it would make her uncomftable if I would start talking about some girl that I like. I bet that every one who was oraz is going through any kind of comming out knows that this is reaction worse than saying she wouldnt want to know me anymore bc she’s still your friend but friends are supposed to talk at lest about most important things!So I told her this, but she her reaction was that we can still be good friends even tho we don’t talk about this one thing. And it would be ok if she wouldn’t talk about some guys that she likes, and I know that I can’t even talk to her about my girlfriend bc I just know it will be VERY akward. Idk I fell like I’m stuck bc I don’t want to bring IT up again. I feel like this all situation is unfair and yes I’m very confused about my sexuality but i’m sure about my feelings to my grilfriend and it makes me sick that I can’t talk about this to anyone. I hope you’re life is great and I wish you best ❤

Lucy

Cars are a hobby of mine, and whenever I’m talking about it with my guy friends, they just chuckle and say ‘sure sure’, assuming I’m only attempting to grab at their interests. As a women, why can’t I like cars?

Orly Einhorn

I have a group of friends, we’ve grown up together since basically day one. There are five of us: me, the twins (both male), and two other boys. I look back on my life and they’ve always played a really big role. They were my closest friends, I guess, but not even, because they left me out of EVERYTHING. Our families have dinner together once a month, and it used to be my least favorite day of the month because I would have to sit with the adults while they talked about whatever while the boys were downstairs playing.If it was video games, it was a four player game. If they were wrestling, I wasn’t allowed to play because I’m a girl. We grew apart for a while, not really talking at all except for at dinners. Then, the twins joined my youth group. I had been in it for about two years already and all my friends were like “oh my god have you met Nick and Michael??? (not their real names) They’re so funny and so much fun!” I hated it. But eventually, it led to us becoming better friends. We started bonding more, but recently they’ve started making really rude jokes about women. They’re really touchy, which is fine because I’m touchy (with limits) with my friends too, but they specifically will try to make me uncomfortable. One of them has a girlfriend and the other almost dated my best friend, but they joke about me cuddling with them or giving them head or having sex with them. I once had my feet on Nick’s lap and he put his hand on my leg and I was like “move your hand that’s weird” and he says “oh like this?” and moves his hand toward my thigh, to which I hit his hand and said “stop it.” He just laughed and kept doing that until I moved away, to which he said “oops made her mad.” I was in their room with that same group and they were saying that I’m “not a hoe” because I don’t sleep around, and I was like “umm okay?’ and Michael tried to grab my boob, but I put my hand out and jokingly held his hand to stop him from doing that. He said “you know I was trying to grab your boob right?” and I was like “yeah I know that’s why I did that” and he said “see! you’re not a hoe! if you were you would’ve let me grab your boob.” And the icing on the cake is I recently decided to play lacrosse. I’m also a cheerleader and I’ve been playing different competitive sports since I was 3, including but not limited to soccer, basketball, tennis, swim, and golf. When the boys found out about lacrosse, they sort of paused and one of them said “you know lacrosse is a very aggressive sport, right?” I’m so sick of them thinking I’m fragile, that I’m just “smart for a girl”, that I can’t handle hanging out with them.