Annalisa

Sometimes when I think of sexism, I think of the big obvious things that have happened; my driving instructor (who I didn’t know and who thought I was a minor) describing a graphic wet dream about me and telling me all the things he would “do to me” if he had known me when he was younger, a man following me home when I was 16, a 40 year old coworker asking me when the last time I “had my p**** sucked” as soon as I was 18, my best friend being raped and the police not even trying to investigate, a guy I had never met following me around campus and grabbing my face, and then threatening to bring a gun and “blow his brains out” because I told him not to touch me. I also think of sexism that is less obvious to some; ads about women and girls being portrayed as sexual toys non stop, men feeling entitled to make comments on your body, the constant fear you experience walking by yourself, especially at night or in a parking lot… And then I think about the sexism no one even notices, like the way we tell boys “don’t do xy and z, that’s for girls” or the fact that we refer to humans as “man” kind, or automatically say “he” when we don’t know the gender of a person. I am so happy to have married a man who isn’t afraid to correct other men about their sexism, who isn’t afraid to embrace his traits that are traditionally feminine, and who isn’t scared to talk about the suffering that women endure. It seems too many men are quiet in the face of sexism, or make arguments to down play it, such as “Men are raped too” or “One time I was scared when I was walking home”. Interesting how they only seem to care about men’s issues when someone wants to talk about women’s.